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Random thoughts.

Entries in this blog

Fires In Australia.

I know there are a few Aussies on this site. Just hoping everyone is safe wherever they are! My daughter has lost her house in the Blue mountains. My other daughters best friend has also lost her house (Susan Antonio who just joined this site recently) and many other friends of theirs have also lost homes or are being impacted by fires in some way or another. It's been the most frightening experience for our family as most of my family live right in Winmalee where over 200 houses hav

Desertrose

Vocals - Thoughts

It's been a long time since I've scratched any thoughts here. I'm feeling particularly irritable due to the insanity of insomnia. 7 am was my bedtime this morning. Anyway. My daughter wants to write and sing songs so maybe I should steer her over here. I think I will. She's my biggest fan, bless her cotton socks. I just wanted to say something about vocals actually, from a non professional position obviously. Others may have much more valuable thoughts. This is just my perspectiv

Desertrose

Blink

Life is a state of permanent impermanence. What’s it all for – this? We feel joy, we feel pain, all in varying degree’s. We get wrapped up in the stupidity of the greed and lust for experiencing everything we can possibly experience in this oh so very impermanent state of being. Then, lights out…it’s gone. Blink. Sometimes even thinking about these things seems so utterly pointless. It takes energy to feel joy and pain, and everything inbetween. Numb takes none. Wr

Desertrose

The Smiling Observer.

"Which came first, the garden gnome or the old man who looks just like a garden gnome?" I don’t know why but that thought kept intruding into my mind very early this crisp Autumn morning as I sat inside the car observing the hustle and bustle of market stall holders loading their wares onto trolleys and steadily piling boxes onto the footpath in preparation for the Ivy market. Was it coincidence that the gnomey old man with his delightfully bulbous red nose was unloading pot plants?

Desertrose

Silly Woman.

“I welcome joy and wonder back into my life.†This is the thought that came into my mind at 3am as I sat out on our back deck, wrapped in my dressing gown looking up at the moon. Closing my eyes, taking a deep breath and exhaling fully I felt a sense of immediate relief. I am back. I wondered to myself as I sat there how many other people might there be, at this very moment sitting out on their back decks looking up at the sky and feeling something similar. As the thoughts wander

Desertrose

A Thousand Dancing Butterflies.

I don’t want to fall asleep Co’s there’s a thousand dancing butterflies Waiting to get in. From a swirl inside my head Like a cloud descending suddenly, they’re dancing in my skin I don’t want to fall sleep face that familiar place of in-between Where things begin to break And it’s not that I’m afraid I’m just tired of all their flutterings Keeping me awake I don’t want to feel insane But it’s insane that sleep should wake me up! How can I e

Desertrose

The Dark Side.

It struck me today that I really do have a ghoulish dark side. My daughter is doing a year 11 art project which involves taking a household object and using it to create 20 different artworks from. She chose an eggplant (that’s my girl!) So far she has different photographs, all very artfully done (this is her “thingâ€, photography), various sketches where the eggplants take on different cutesy characters and some carved eggplants which are again – cute. She complained to me that h

Desertrose

So Damn Cool!

I'm sitting here listening to keyboards and guitar being played next door in my daughters bedroom. In there are two young teenage girls exploring this fantastic, exciting world of endless inspiration that music brings. Just as books can enthrall and captivate, taking you to worlds in your head (and heart)so can music. Although I've heard the same rendition of a song for the thousandth (is that a word?) time, and I do worry a little about the neighbours, I can't help but think how lucky I a

Desertrose

Dearly Beloved Warbling One.

Looking at the instruction leaflet for my new GHD hair straightener I was amused to read that it "goes into shiver mode" when its cold and makes "warbling noises". Funny that. Sounds just like my hubby in winter. Speaking of which....My God, what is UP with this crazy weather? Positively chilly today! Something like 75 % of NSW is currently flooding! That's an area as big as France, so they said on the news. I have never seen so much rain! My brother is right now filming, for the n

Desertrose

When I Grow Up...

So it’s my birthday tomorrow. I’m not “doing’ birthdays anymore I’ve decided. It’s depressing seeing the numbers climb and I don’t want to think of myself in terms of a number because it confuses me. What should a forty four year old woman look like, act like, sound like….. Who should she be? I don’t “feel†that number, but hey, everybody says that, don’t they? I don’t however still feel like I am twenty -THAT person is gone. I remember her….I can se

Desertrose

Do As I Say, Not As I Do.

How does one start the day with the plan and intention of going to a belly dance class and end up doing a 90 minute Israeli Folk dance class, in a totally different suburb as WELL, with a person you’ve only spoken to twice for about ten minutes in total? I have to wonder about myself sometimes. After belly dance class, which was once again inspiring and refreshing both mentally and physically, I was invited by this woman – a stranger really (can’t even remember her name?) to go with he

Desertrose

Tangled.

My head feels tangled. I feel tangled, strangled and frustrated. Its not been a good day. Why won’t the words come when I want to write a song? The things I want to say. Do I even have anything to say? It’s been a LONG, “not good day†as I woke up at 5am. Bloody ridiculous. One week I’m only getting to SLEEP at 5am and the next I’m waking up at that ungodly hour. All I know is that 5 am looks, feels and sounds different depending on whether it's the time you fall

Desertrose

Beautiful Things.

Nature makes beautiful things. Remarkable, spectacular amazing things. We set off early for a trip up to Jenolan caves, two hours from home. The drive there is scenic….rolling hills, lush green country side and miles of pine forest plantations. We stopped for morning tea (but I forgot the tea cups, lol!) and I filmed for a while in one of the forests. Fairy tale white spotted red toadstools were pushing up from the ground everywhere among the fallen pine needles. Just magic! The

Desertrose

Just.....be.....quiet....

There is something rather “exhibitionistic†about blogging. One wonders how far you could, or should go. This whole thing – the internet….billions of voices all crying out to be heard. (Imagine the energy that creates in the universe? Out there in cyberspace?) There's something rather pathetic about that, but then again also very human. You could conclude that human behavior then is – pathetic, or is it just that we’re all the same and like a dog pissing on a lamp post we all

Desertrose

Do Nothing Days.

I'm supposed to be writing in a journal, every day for the next eight weeks of this Unveil class. Self discovery and all that.... So, towards the within I go. I'm kind of cheating by writing here, but I've lost track of all my other failed blogs that were started with good intention and I just don't "do" paper and pen anymore. It was one of those days where you just don't achieve much. Laundry - my God, for the third day in a row there was blue sky! I'd forgotten what that looked like

Desertrose

Coming Back.

I started a new belly dance course today called Unveil which focuses on “empowering the feminineâ€. Not that I have any problem in the feminine department because it seems I am 100% living in the feminine realm – which in itself can be a problem. (Its always about balance) I’ve been living, for so long now completely in the “heartâ€â€¦.too much emotion stuff going on. Too much being still and “feeling†rather than actually getting off my arse and DOING. There have been many ye

Desertrose

In My Own Skin.

There was a time in my life when the thought of leaving my own house filled me with terror. In even darker times I even began believing that an evil force had taken possession of my mind. If there is a precipice between sanity and insanity I was balanced on the very edge of it and peered briefly down into “madness”. It all began when I was around fifteen and began dabbling with drugs. Nothing too heavy, a little bit of pot here and there, alcohol, and pain pills. I had been suff

Desertrose

The Homeless Man

I went into the city today...took the kids to Macdonalds for lunch. It was really busy, dead on the lunch hour rush so we ended up sitting at the seats that line the windows overlooking the busy shoppers walkway. As I went to take a bite out of my burger I looked out at the view of a homeless man lying on the bench outside, asleep. He was slumped on his side, one arm outstretched with a grubby dangling hand almost touching the ground. His fly was unzipped revealing filthy boxer shorts

Desertrose

You Are Or You Aren't.

It was the darndest thing....... I went into a public toilet in a shopping complex the other day, lots of cubicles...nice and clean... ONE door had been painted a pretty shade of purple in complete contrast to the others, and in big white letters - not graffiti - properly painted commercially on the outer side of the door, it said... "You are or you aren't." Somebody else quickly stepped in front of me and went INTO that cubicle and it got me wondering....."were they or weren't t

Desertrose

A Song Is Like A Good Lover..........?

I’ll tell you my analogy for a good song A song is like a really good attentive, interesting lover! It MUST have the initial attraction – which happens in the first 20 seconds or so, (maybe even less), of the song, so obviously that includes the intro….. and very importantly the opening lyrical lines! Imagine a bad pick up line- turns a person RIGHT off from the word go . Weak opening lines in my opinion are things like “I woke up this morning........”. (Just one loose example a

Desertrose

The Penis Enlarger.

One of my daughters came home from school and told me that her teacher had a penis enlarger in his storeroom. Actually, her and her little friend BOTH told me this with big wide solemn eyes that only nine year olds possess when they're trying to tell you something VERY important. My first stunned question was "How do you KNOW it was a penis enlarger?" And with eyes growing wider by the second they explained, "Because it had it WRITTEN on it....Pee-NIS En LARGE- ER" Well, that did

Desertrose

The "castle"

According to the description the real estate site gave on the net we now live in a "medieval-like castle" built in 1919. Of course, it's not REALLY a castle. Doesn't look a bit like a castle from the outside - most of it is covered in ivy so you can't see much, but all the interior walls are made out of rough stone that's been limewashed and there are enough arches to drive a person crazy! The owner wanted to rent it furnished and he did have a lot of really chunky dark wood medieval type

Desertrose

The Inspiriations Of A Sweet Potato

I was standing in front of the stove cooking dinner when my eleven year old daughter, reading a form that needed to be filled in for school, asked... "What do I write for mums occupation?" "Nothing....mum doesn't do anything." said my sixteen year old. Whirling around with a wooden spoon in my hand I snapped.... "That's right, I sit on my backside on the couch all day eating bon bons watching days of our lives! Yup, that's me - she who doesn't do ANYTHING." "I didn't mean THAT mum!"

Desertrose

Guardian Angel?

Over the years I seem to meet more and more people who believe in "angels". Now the sceptical side of me completely pooh poohs the whole idea as to me it conjures up a far too fluffy image of etherial, half naked cherubs playing fiddles in the sky and since I don't believe in heaven or God then it's only natural that these kinds of "angels" don't really fit into my realm of thinking either. But....... I have to say that at least ONCE in my lifetime thus far, I have had an experience that I

Desertrose

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