Jump to content

 

Songwriting and Music Forum: Demon Woman - Songwriting and Music Forum

Read Before Posting

Post a minimum of 1 critique for each posting of your own song.

Subscribe to your topics and the topics you reply to when you post! More here

Let people know what you are looking for from a critique.

Only post songs you have permission to post.

Please review our Board Guidelines before you start posting.

Tips for getting reviews

Posting a song? PLEASE SUBSCRIBE TO YOUR TOPIC!
Page 1 of 1
  • You cannot start a new topic
  • You cannot reply to this topic

Demon Woman Jon Tyler Rate Topic: -----

#1 User is offline   JonTyler 

  • Active Member
  • PipPipPip
  • Group: Active Members
  • Posts: 10
  • Joined: 04-January 10
  • Main Musical Instrument:vocals

Posted 30 January 2010 - 12:21 AM

This is a link to a recording of Demon Woman posted on YouTube

http://www.youtube.c...u/1/Rn0YPuPKvhc

http://www.youtube.com/BulldozerBetty

(performance includes vocals by Jon Tyler, lead guitar by Bobby Kane)


Demon Woman
by Jon Tyler


Demon Woman
lying in my bed
Demon Woman
lying in my bed
Have you come to steal my soul
or steal my heart instead

Fan keep on a-turning
turning round and round
Fan keep on a-turning
turning round and round
She'll lead you to the sea of love
Then she'll watch you drown

Raindrops on my window
Looking in my room
Raindrops on my window
looking in my room
When I wake up in the morning
Will you be here too

Demon Woman
lying in my bed
Demon woman
Lying in my bed
Have you come to steal my soul
or steal my heart instead

This post has been edited by JonTyler: 08 February 2010 - 04:38 PM

0

#2 User is offline   john 

  • Smile, Be Happy
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • View blog
  • View gallery
  • Group: Site Crew
  • Posts: 10,553
  • Joined: 03-January 02
  • Location:Scotland
  • Interests:songwriting, guitar, piano and keys, singing, recording and technology, art, programming, computer games, reading, motorbikes... lots of stuff really :)
  • Main Musical Instrument:Guitar

Posted 10 March 2010 - 04:36 PM

Hi

Your song has been added to the Songstuff Channel :)

For me the lead guitar tone and sound just didn't sit with the mix. A nice clear recording but not gelling too well.

Vocals wise, a nice voice, but your performance lacked feeling. It felt like you were holding back, and not really getting into it. I think at least part of that was a lack of ornamentation... as such the guitar and vocals sounded separated from each other and to a degree (sound wise) from the back line.

All in it didn't really have a stand out factor for me. Lyrically it could do more... it needs more story. What you have is fine, but a bit like the performance it seems a little disconnected.

What you have does have potential, but I think it needs some more work.

I hope that helps

Cheers

John




* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
0
Page 1 of 1
  • You cannot start a new topic
  • You cannot reply to this topic

1 User(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users