yarko

Wait For The Dawn - Mastered!

22 posts in this topic

After the great critique I received from my first post on this forum, I took the advice offered and remixed a few of the culprit channels and had the song mastered at a lab (gave up trying to do it myself). Below are the lyrics to the song (some added since the last post). Honest opinions are very welcome. It's been a great experience so far particularly for a guy who isn't all that familiar with (nor has much patience for) the production side of things. Thanks!

John

SONG

http://johnsilveronl...olute_Final.mp3

LYRICS

Rush in; It's yours for the taking

Last chance; better swallow it down

Breathe in the circumstances

You only want what you haven't yet found

You're free to be what you could never be

Walking softly with your feet on the ground

Come on in, the doors wide open

Just leave your head outside and take your heart for a ride

Wait for the Dawn

Misunderstandings are just another door locked within

Wait for the Dawn

There's no use pretending that you will ever find another way home

Wait for the Dawn

You can't stay forever and you can't start over again

(Another life flies over when the dark sets in - everybody waits when the heart breaks for the dawn)

Wait for...wait for it...wait for...wait for the dawn

Rest now, I know you are weary

Everyone needs a second or two

Hearts forged in the fires of Heaven spend a

lifetime beating on the glaciers of Earth

You're free to see what you have never seen

Eyes open and the sentinel gone

Welcome home! The fire's still burning

Just leave your life outside - put on these garments of Light

Wait for the Dawn

Misunderstandings are just another door locked within

Wait for the Dawn

There's no use pretending that you will ever find another way home

Wait for the Dawn

You can't stay forever and you can't start over again

(Another life flies over when the dark sets in - everybody waits when the heart breaks for the dawn)

Wait for...wait for it...wait for...wait for the dawn

Edited by yarko

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Hi John. I'm new to the critiquing of songs so I'm just listening the best I can and saying what I hear. I'm listening on a pair of Fostex PM-1 MKII's

Beautiful guitar tones on the clean chordal work in the ambient intro and outro I just love those kind of sounds. Soon as I heard it I wanted to listen more and when it finished I still wanted to hear more of it :-)

Uncertain about the distorted guitar. I think it sounds fine but do you think it possibly needs a little more EQ tweaking?

The drums sound nicely done. A fat punchy kick drum and I like how I can just slightly hear the metal wire vibrate against the head on the snare for every hit.

I cant hear the hi-hats that much, I can mostly hear kick, snare, toms and a bit of cymbals.

As I am bassist, I can hear the bass nicely and the tone is good and even. From the lows to the higher fret work nothing is lost or too loud.

I do feel though that there could be a bit more width, space and clarity.

Structure and flow of the song sounds all good to me.

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ZonSonus,

Thanks for the listen. Your feedback (and the detail you went into) is much appreciated, man. I'll listen again for the things you mentioned. Haven't listened on every platform yet. A bass player? Do you know how rare you are? I can never find one when I need one. :(

Thanks, again for an insightful review!

John

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Hi John,

I've heard a good number of rock bands back in my teenage years, and I got to say I hear a lot of Staind in your style.

Great vocal melody! I like the falsetto at the beginning of the 2nd part of each verse, I wanted to hear it again before the chorus but that's just my personal preference so don't listen to me.

Im not sure if you're also asking for feedback on your composition and lyrics, or is it just the production?

Peace,

Ken

Edited by ImKeN

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Hi John,

I've heard a good number of rock bands back in my teenage years, and I got to say I hear a lot of Staind in your style.

Great vocal melody! I like the falsetto at the beginning of the 2nd part of each verse, I wanted to hear it again before the chorus but that's just my personal preference so don't listen to me.

Im not sure if you're also asking for feedback on your composition and lyrics, or is it just the production?

Peace,

Ken

Ken, Thanks a lot for that! Sorry it's been a bit for the reply...been out of town. The Staind reference surprised me but I'm certainly not offended! Those cats sing their hearts out. Funny, the falsetto is a new thing for me. Growing up a speed metal drummer I made horrible fun of singers who implemented that kind of thing. Then I heard Peter Gabriel use it and I remember it being very emotional for me. I think it eventually subconsciously slipped in to my own work a few years ago and hasn't let go yet. I'm looking for feedback on anything you care to throw out there. I do all of this stuff (drums, guitars, bass, keys, etc) on my own so I lose all perspective in the fog of war. I'm often embarrased to release a CD or anything that I've done myself to the point where I'll make up names and tack them onto instruments and production credits. So, yeah! Fire away, man and thanks, again, for the insightful review.

John

Edited by yarko

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Hey John, gud to hear from u.

After listening to your song for more than a few times now, I don't think I really had anything to critique in the 1st place. I was gonna say that there was too much repeating going on in the chorus, but now I think the chorus is really catchy and memorable.

So, great song and great production! :thumbup:

All the best,

Ken

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Well, that was fascinating! I just listened to the earlier version of this song, then noticed that you had a mastered version as well, so listened to this.

Great job! I liked the original version, but found the guitars a bit overpowering. In this version, all of that has gone (and I can now hear the bass) and the song itself is allowed to shine.

You have a good voice, and the vocal is now central, as it should be, with the instrumentation supporting it beautifully.

I have no criticisms. This is a good song, produced very well and is a beautiful tribute to your father. Bravo, sir!

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Sounds really good, nice voice also. And good recording! My only point is in the Chorus when you sing for wait for down, i miss more power in it. Should be more powerfull in my opinion. As i'm writing and listening now, it could be maybe too much, as in, i't wont fit if your gonna scream or something. But maybe backing vocals who have more scream/power. (scream not extreme, but more a yel) Current backing vocals are also nice!

And at 3:15 the chorus doesn't come in power full. Maybe you could try (translated from dutch) 'quiet before the storm' . Just a stop and then quiet. Perhaps tune everything 1 or 2 notes higher. It will gives a boost, more power.

But nice song anyway!

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Wow man!

That sounds really professional! Very nice jopb!

Pascal

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I'm listening on my laptop with headphones on. The quality is clearly great, but I wish your vocals were louder because right now they sound like they are hiding a bit behind the music. As for the song itself, I like the music, I like the melody, the lyrics, it's a cool song. Good job!

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Well, that was fascinating! I just listened to the earlier version of this song, then noticed that you had a mastered version as well, so listened to this.

Great job! I liked the original version, but found the guitars a bit overpowering. In this version, all of that has gone (and I can now hear the bass) and the song itself is allowed to shine.

You have a good voice, and the vocal is now central, as it should be, with the instrumentation supporting it beautifully.

I have no criticisms. This is a good song, produced very well and is a beautiful tribute to your father. Bravo, sir!

Thanks, Alistair! That means a lot, man.

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Sounds really good, nice voice also. And good recording! My only point is in the Chorus when you sing for wait for down, i miss more power in it. Should be more powerfull in my opinion. As i'm writing and listening now, it could be maybe too much, as in, i't wont fit if your gonna scream or something. But maybe backing vocals who have more scream/power. (scream not extreme, but more a yel) Current backing vocals are also nice!

And at 3:15 the chorus doesn't come in power full. Maybe you could try (translated from dutch) 'quiet before the storm' . Just a stop and then quiet. Perhaps tune everything 1 or 2 notes higher. It will gives a boost, more power.

But nice song anyway!

Nazlive, mooie woorden! Thanks for the ideas. Harmonies were really something I wanted to incorporate. I just ran out of time. You are right, though! When it comes time to remix and master the track I'll definitely add them. Thanks, again!

John

Wow man!

That sounds really professional! Very nice jopb!

Pascal

Thank you, sir! :)

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I'm listening on my laptop with headphones on. The quality is clearly great, but I wish your vocals were louder because right now they sound like they are hiding a bit behind the music. As for the song itself, I like the music, I like the melody, the lyrics, it's a cool song. Good job!

Good points! Vocals are kind of a weak point for me. I'm going to be releasing this song on my latest CD which should release sometime next year. Reworking the vocal tracks are what I will be focusing on most. Thanks!

John

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As stated before, this sounds really good! I think you did a great job with the backing vocals, both the clean and the more distorted sounding.

The bass in the bridge gives a nice feel, and there's some very good guitar work there. Though the last chorus could use some more power, so

that it really stands out from the end of the bridge. I think making the chording guitar more central, and present in both speakers could

result in a nice effect.

All in all, a very good track!

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Thanks, Baranoi! I appreciate your input. I hope to revisit this track in a month or so.

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Hey John,

Really enjoyed this tune! Had to give it a second listen. The guitar effect in the very first line "rush in" competes with the vocal and I thought it was an auto-tune effect on the vocal track. The effect seemed to go away after the 3rd line. The guitar parts are busy competing with the vocal the entire songs. The backing tracks are mixed great, I just think the vocals need to come up in the mix. The vocal mix seemed better to me in the second verse. I don't think that extra vocal track near the end of the choruses adds anything. The lyrics are well written. When you combine that with a catchy melody and good structure you have a great song! I gonna listen again. Thanks for sharing.

Bob

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This is a pretty catchy tune, man. Production value is really high. My only gripe, which others have already pointed out, is that the vocals are hiding behind the music. They lack the presence needed to make them stand out among so much amazing instrumentation. I'm just a novice when it comes to mixing, but I'd love to hear this remixed with the vocals more upfront. Though, it seems like your album is off to a good start with a song like this. I look forward to hearing more.

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Wow. This is my kind of music. I would buy all of your CDs I'm just saying. I can't critique anything, this is perfect. Now go get famous dude because you have IT.

smh... so much talent....

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Hey John...

Slick production...nicely done all around.

Larry

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Great recording! It sounds very pro and radio-ready. It sounds perfect.

If there was one piece of constructive feedback, I'd suggest dialing back the vocal effects or eq'ing on the first chorus, so that it blends with the verses a bit more. But a minor thing, and probably just me anyways.

Great job all around. Jg

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Wow, I've got to check in here more often. Thank you all for your input!

jg, great point. Vocal eq-ing is very, very tough for me. It's what I am focusing on more than ever. Thanks!

Larry, thanks very much!

Kymlee, well at least I know I have one sale ready to hand! ;) And that goes for your album as well.

crowded space, thank you,man! I'll keep you updated as I post more stuff!

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very good song. You can begin to promote it, it is completely ready!

Edited by vicchmill

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