TheShamrockCrew

New Pop/electro Song - Booty Call

5 posts in this topic

Here is another one. It's a racy song but there's nothing that explicit going on other than me saying "booty call". As usual I produced, wrote, and performed it. My goal is to become a songwriter. Feedback is welcome.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkBztMUduSs

Edited by TheShamrockCrew

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I thought this was pretty good. Clean recording. Good audio space. Simple orchestration.

Nice job.

Cho

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Nice beat, man! I pretty much liked the song but the chorus was a bit too light and fast for my liking.

There were some phrasing issues here and there. For example: "I got a serious addiction I can't fight," sounded like you were rushing the word too much. Plus, u also used "serious" a couple of lines back so you might wanna change it to another word?

Another phrase that I wasn't too convinced about was, "its an emergency get out of my way." I think the vocals could use more energy/range starting from that area into the chorus?

Some very clever vocal ideas you had: 0:27, 0:47, 0:50. It might sound more interesting if you shifted 0:50("double") to half a beat earlier? Just a thought.

The bridge was great, had a lot of melodic contrast. I think you could use the bridge vocals in final choruses? Just another thought..lol

Anyway, I enjoyed listening to it. :specool:

Ken

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Nice beat, man! I pretty much liked the song but the chorus was a bit too light and fast for my liking.

There were some phrasing issues here and there. For example: "I got a serious addiction I can't fight," sounded like you were rushing the word too much. Plus, u also used "serious" a couple of lines back so you might wanna change it to another word?

Another phrase that I wasn't too convinced about was, "its an emergency get out of my way." I think the vocals could use more energy/range starting from that area into the chorus?

Some very clever vocal ideas you had: 0:27, 0:47, 0:50. It might sound more interesting if you shifted 0:50("double") to half a beat earlier? Just a thought.

The bridge was great, had a lot of melodic contrast. I think you could use the bridge vocals in final choruses? Just another thought..lol

Anyway, I enjoyed listening to it. :specool:

Ken

Hey there. Thanks for listening. That's so embarrassing that I didn't notice I used serious twice! I just changed it in the video above. As for the other changes, I will probably have to tinker with all my songs in the end so thank you for the suggestions! I will be sure to try them out.

As for you Cho,

Thank you for the nice comments as well :-) Made my day!

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I think the electronica would work better replaced by some actual instruments - bass guitar, drums etc. I don't hear the rhythm and beat I'd expect, though it gets a little better after the intro - once the song is in progress.

The singer sounds androgynous. I think it would sound better, to my ears, if the vocals were explicitly male or female. Unless you are going to shop this around for either and don't intend on this vocal being the final product. Some may have no problem with it, so it's really just a personal preference.

The good thing is - the lyric is fitting for either gender. Producers are going to end up autotuning the bejesus out of it anyway.

Yeah, the lyric isn't as tight as it could be in some places but where it's not bang on - I didn't find it all that jarring.

Overall, I liked it. I could dance to it, for sure.

Edited by Joniemack

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