A couple of notes
-- Acoustic, electric, bass guitars all me
-- Electric piano has been laboriously assembled with my MIDI controller and cut'n'paste
-- Drums and tambourine are Apple loops with a few effects added
I'm never very happy with my vocals, but this one is extra bad. When I am able I am going to take voice lessons to do something about that. But that might not be for a year or two.
In the meantime I advise using headphones to avoid inflicting this on pets, small children or other innocents.
I'm looking for constructive critique on all aspects of this track from lyrics, through performance to recording and mixing. Both barrels. I'm keen to learn. Have at it!
After getting some really good crits I did a new version where I re-recorded the vocals and guitars. I also played around with the percussion loops.
Here it is
Â© polar bears of arizona 2012
Between high and low tides there's about five miles
I must navigate through shoals and isles
Trying to find my way out to
Open ocean, wide and blue
Pharmacy will anchor me
While I overnight in the headland's lee
Winter storms may obscure my view
Winter storms will blow on through
With the rising of the sun I set sail
But with a heavy sea it's to no avail
I'm beaten back by the rising wind
I fear the reefs may do me in
Pharmacy will comfort me
While I consider what my fate will be
Winter storms may wreck your boat
Winter storms can make it hard to stay afloat
As the storm subsides I'm glad to be alive
My craft is battered, but has survived
A constant wind now fills my sails
I'm heading south, following the whales
Pharmacy will pilot me
Until I find myself some friendly quay
Winter storms may stir the sea
But winter storms will not sink me
Edited by pboaz, 30 September 2012 - 11:45 PM.