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Roll the dice - Idea for song


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Is this the right pleace to post this?
Did record this song/demo at home (on a Boss BR600). Just two guitars and the vocals. It is not ment to be a perfect demo just a recording to get/give an impression about what the song could become (Idea for a song). I would appreciate some feedback. What do you think of what I have so far? Thanks in advance [smiley=acoustic.gif]
 

Roll the dice:
Let’s roll the dice, let the game begin.
What are the changes, to lose again.
If this is what you’re living for, If this is what you’re longing for.
No one said it would be easy, but it might be worth trying.

 

 

For there may never be a time like this again (bay).

And you may never get a chance like this again.
For you may never feel alive like this again (bay).
And the clock keeps ticking…

 

 

Let’s roll the dice, double our lost bet.

Let’s grab that last chance, before we go to sleep.
And in the morning we’ll start over, and try it all again.
No one said it would be easy, but it might be worth trying.

 

For there may never be a time like this again (bay).

And we may never get a chance like this again.
For we may never be alive like this again (bay).
And the clock keeps ticking…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by A3D
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Normally you'd want to post in the song and recording section:

http://forums.songstuff.com/forum/20-song-and-recording-critique/

 

This sounds pretty good but I can't get past the "dices." The plural of dice is dice, not dices. Dices is rarely used but when chopping food in a sentence such as "He dices the food at the restaurant." Even then it'd be better to say "at the restaurant his job is to dice food."

 

One "dice" = Die  Two or more = Dice

 

Caveat: It's music and we now tweet and text. So technically you can try to invent something new all the time. 

Edited by Just1L
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Thank you both for the command / remarks. That was very helpful for me. Did make the adjustments  in the written lyrics. It will  takes a bit longer to re-record the song, but I will do so in time…

 
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