Psychos Halloween

[Alex Witt]

Gobble gobble shut up with the squabble, be a model drink this bottle and let your body wobble. Collossal, awful yeah that's yo nozzle. Your like ol Donald except with a f*cked up personal novel. Let me remodel your nozzle because you look so goggle. Imma grab my pliers and turn you back into the 1963 Michael myers. Trick or treat welcome to my street it's nice to meet. Imma beat you and eat under the sheet just to see if it taste a little like wheat. Defeat, repeat cause I'm an elite your pathetic and incomplete. Shh be discreet and take a backseat because you can't compete Pete. So go on and retreat like a sheep. I'm goin to preheat the oven to reheat petes legs, arms, and stomach to eat before I go back to sleep. Stick my cleat on your throat to watch you choke like you ain't got no control. I've been mistreat so I feasted on a deceased priest and mix his blood with some yeast to make him some treats. Take you up to my suite and unleash the beast. Hit you wit my meat and make you shriek, leak and maybe bleach you if I feel the need, and repeat if I don't feel complete. Let's take a sneak peek, but first let's have a family feast, and eat Pete. 

[ImKeN]

 

[Alex Witt]

Yeah Ik. What are you trying to say

[ImKeN]

Welcome to Songstuff?

[Alex Witt]

Thanks

[Richard Tracey]

Alex - its normally customary for new members to introduce themselves in the relevant section, before posting. It is also asked that new members join in with the community and post comments/critique on other members topics. This shows that you are here to engage and you are more likely to get people commenting on your topic.

 

Can I also ask you edit this post to read like a lyric and not one big long paragraph with the words running into each other. Again, this will put members off reading this. You also don't mention what you are looking for from the members, as you don't make any mention of what kind of critique you are looking for. 

 

Thanks.

[Alex Witt]

Thanks for the advice. I am looking for any type of critique.

[boombastic]

Good shit man your flow and subject matter reminds me of Eminem during his early slim shady phase. Work on the structure a little bit so it's easier to read and easier for you to control. I used to write the same way, but we're not writing an essay. 

Check out these artists man and see if they resonate with you..

 

Good luck to you keep workin' 

[Alex Witt]

Thank you really appreciate it. I already listen to Ritts and his flow and rhymes are sick! Can't wait to check your stuff out!