Will Sketches

Song about naughty stuff...

12 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

Hi all.

 

I've recorded a song, and would love to you guys' and gals' opinions on it. It's a rough mix, a bit out of balance especially in the coda. Please let me know what you think! 

 

Update: New version: https://soundcloud.com/will-sketches/rock-with-your-love-new-demo

 

Old version: https://soundcloud.com/willem-h-de-boer/rock-with-your-love-additional-vocals

 

 

 

Edited by Will Sketches
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Hey Will,

 

Cool song. It feels a little stagnant, though. I think it would feel a little more complete if the first "gimme your love" section was as full as the second one. Long stereo chords and stuff. That section would also be better if the bass was playing driving 1/8th notes for the two bars during the vocal, and switching back to the staccato-kick-drum-sync thing you have now for the next two bars, then repeat. The staccato-bass-kick-drum-sync thing you have now is cool, but drags on a bit too long for me.

 

Finally, I think some Prince-esque LinnDrum samples (claps/percussion), if done right, could help the song feel a little different later on.

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Posted (edited)

Thanks for your feedback! That's very useful. I was wondering if the staccato thing goes on for too long myself. Your suggestions are great, I'm going to try them out!

Edited by Will Sketches

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Posted (edited)

I have tried to alter the feel of the different sections, and also get a more continuous rhythm established from the second verse onwards. I think it makes the song better, so thanks again for your suggestions!

 

Here's the new track for those interested in hearing the difference:

 

https://soundcloud.com/willem-h-de-boer/rock-with-your-love-new-demo

 

 

Edited by Will Sketches
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This sounds really good(the updated version), @Will Sketches. The arrangement and everything sounds very cool - kinda reminds me of Prince a little bit. I like how the drum pattern gradually grow as the song moves along. The electric guitar was brilliant and your vocals really suit this style.

 

The performance and everything sounded great but I thought the song structure could use a little adjusting after the 2nd chorus: 

I started losing focus at about 2:29, I think the final chorus could have come in there or maybe you could write a bridge there? I thought the final chorus and outro could have been half it's length - I also started losing focus there. These were the main thoughts that came to me after I listened for a few times.

 

Great song,

 

Ken

 

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This is a damn cool tune! Love the Prince Vibes in this one. I think the mix with the wide pan is Perfect for this kinde of tune. It leaves a lot of Space for what is going on.
As others have pointed out it might be a little dragged out and repetitive in the ending. Apart from that, Good job!

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Thanks for your comments both! Very much appreciated. The outro is a bit long.* I will edit it to be shorter.

 

(*) The days of self-indulgent solo sections are well and truly gone...

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Posted (edited)

I really dig it, and love the playing and singing.  (I only listened to the new version.)   But, except for the LInn drums idea, I agree with everything the caterpillar said.  I'll add that I personally think the song takes much too long to open up in the stereo field and that even before the first chorus I think the guitars should get away from dead center.  Right now, for quite a long time from the start the song is really mono-sounding with only the stereo reverb on the snare providing sound away from center.  I also think the chorus power chords would better serve this song if they had a little more balls - i.e., fuller-sounding chords with a little more distorted sustain.  After all, you're saying you want to "rock with your love." :)

 

Good Stuff!

 

P.S.  For this kind of tune, I don't need to hear a deep lyric to appreciate the song.  But, I think this write could be more sophisticated and still suit the song.  Even the hook is pretty unimaginative - certainly no Little Red Corvette.  But, that's my bias.  I want to hear more Prince and less Michael Jackson. ;)

 

 

Edited by HoboSage
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I'm not a huge Prince fan, but this tune makes me want to be one.  Solid musicianship all around.  LOVE the guitar work and the BVs. Yeah the canned drums sterilize it a bit, but there's no denying your talent.  Agree that the lyric is not that important.. Uhmm.. I don't even remember what it's about. BUT - I can only imagine how fabulous this would be if the lyric was as inspired as the music. -Mark

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Thank you both for your comments. Very useful feedback, and I'm glad you like the tune! 

 

18 hours ago, M57 said:

I'm not a huge Prince fan, but this tune makes me want to be one.  [...]

 

Thank you for the compliment! 

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Posted (edited)

 

This is a very solid demo. The second version is a big improvement.

 

This song is fresh and highly compelling for the first three minutes. REALLY strong stuff. But, the last minute seems tacked on... self indulgent... perhaps even slightly derivative. Meaning that I feel I've heard that ending before, on many, many songs. Personally, I think the tune is absolutely strong enough to warrant coming up with an ending that is as cool and original as the rest of the song.

 

Contrary to what others may have said, I think the staccato work in the beginning defines the song. An ending that slowly devolves back to that staccato beat might do the trick. I also think you could easily... get this song down to a run time of 3:30. Every second of it a top notch pop offering. Like I said, the first three minutes is already that good.

 

Funny thing about all the "Prince" comments. Just shows how under appreciated Lenny Kravitz is, in my opinion. You sound like you've been influenced by LK a lot more than Prince, in my opinion.

 

Oh, and about solos.... yeah, the days of the soul searing three minute solo extravaganza might be a thing if the past, but the solo you did added real content to the song. It moves the core melodic elements forward and keeps it fresh. AND there's always fills and licks. You could have... still could... pepper this tune with fills and licks. Maybe not quite the same as a ripping solo, but still...

 

What would Lenny do?

 

Cheers...

 

 

Edited by RobAsh15
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Thanks, @Rob Ash, for your comments. Really appreciated! 

 

I'm going to change the coda of the song, shorten it a bit, and perhaps add a new section before it. It's got a point now though, where I can't hear it anymore. I can't objectively listen to it anymore like an outsider would. It needs revisiting in a few weeks' time!

 

I hear you about Lenny Kravitz. The man is under appreciated for sure.

 

I appreciate everyone's comments about Prince, I love his work. It's kind of ironic, because I come from a guitar background. My teens were spent listening to Nirvana, Soundgarden and that kind of thing, and very little Prince except for what was on the TV/radio!

 

Thanks!

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