Timbre

Won't Let Me Fall Too Far

3 posts in this topic

This one's been percolating a while. Sometimes the heart knows best . . . or does it? Comments and ideas are most welcome.

 

Won’t Let Me Fall Too Far

 

Copyright © 2017 by L.C. Campbell

 

V1

I’ve taken my wrong turns

I’ve taken those short cuts

I’ve woken up all alone

Not knowing which way was up

 

I’ve given in too fast

I’ve given away too much

My heart learned its lesson

I’m not safe to trust

 

V2

I’m seeing clear now

And my mind is made up

This one feels different

This could be the one

 

Can almost touch the real thing

Almost taste his sweet love

But my heart just won’t let me

Get close enough

 

Ch1

He’s everything that I could ever want

But I’ve been careless with my heart

Now it won’t let me fall too far

 

I swear this time is different

I can feel it in his touch

But I’ve been careless with my heart

Now it won’t let me fall in love

 

V3

He’s taken his wrong turns

He’s taken those short cuts

He’s tried to go it alone

But he’s giving that up

 

So I wanna go too fast

I wanna give too much

But my heart just won’t let me

Take this chance on love

 

Ch

He’s everything that I could ever want

But I’ve been careless with my heart

Now it won’t let me fall too far

 

I swear this time is different

I can feel it in his touch

But I’ve been careless with my heart

Now it won’t let me fall in love

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Hi Timbre. I like your song allot. I think you could improve the title. I've given you a few ideas for possible changes....but they are just quick and off the top of my head. Just wanted to give you something to chew on. You may not see a thing here that you can use....cus it's nice the way you have it. But I do think you might want to get rid of a few of the words I've and I. Hope this is helpful in some way. Joey

 

My Heart Won't Let Me 

 

V1

I’ve taken my wrong turns

Tried too many shortcuts

I’ve woken up all alone

Not knowing which way was up

 

I’ve caved way too fast

And given away too much

Now my heart’s learned its lesson

I’m not safe to trust

 

V2

I’m seeing clear now

My mind is made up

This time feels different

He might be the one

 

This feels like the real thing

Wanna taste his sweet love

But my heart just won’t let me

Get close enough

 

Ch

He’s everything I ever wanted

But I’ve been careless with my heart

And it won’t let me fall too far

 

I swear this time is different

I can feel it in his touch

But I’ve been down dead ends before

My heart won’t let me fall in love

 

V3

He’s made a few u-turns

Got stuck taking short cuts

Tried to go it alone

But he’s giving that up........might be a good idea to change up V3 to make it a little more different from V1.

 

So I wanna go too fast

I wanna give too much

But my heart just won’t let me

Take this chance on love

 

Ch

 

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Hi, Joey.

 

Thanks for you comments. I will definitely think them over. The title feels not quite right to me too. I'm wondering about going shorter rather than switching up the words--maybe just Fall Too Far. I think that works 2 ways--the singer feels she has fallen too far in her past and now her heart won't let her fall too far out of self-preservation. Something to think on.

 

In this set of lyrics I've been experimenting with different types of repetition. I tried out repetition of the "taken", "given" and other words in lines 1 and 2 of most verses. Didn't quite work for V3 (yet), but still working on it. The 1st verse came to me all at once (melody and all) and the repetition felt right because it helped me double down on the main idea underlying the lines. In V1 the main idea is poor decisions (short cuts, wrong turns). In V2 the main idea is lack of self-preservation (give away too much, too soon). There's an insistence to it that fits the vibe for me so pretty happy with those lines (for now).

 

On the back half in V3 I repeated V1 from the guy's perspective to make the point he's made the same mistakes, so I used the same words to help drive that point home. I also like the idea that the singer has chosen someone who has made the same mistakes she has made and, like her, is choosing a different path. That makes her all the more sure that she doesn't need to hold back--which is the message in V4. Still think those sections need some TLC. Thanks for some ideas to chew on. ~T

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