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Giora Tal

Draft #1 When You're Not Happy

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Giora Tal    5

Hi all, hope all is well.

I usually write lyrics once I have a basic melody and maybe structure. 

This is the melody track

 

Here is the first draft of the lyrics, what do you think?

 

Maybe it's the weather, 100 of raindrops in your heart.

They say it would get colder but you haven't felt warmth in a very long time.

Wake up every morning, and you feel like you left something behind

They say it would get harder, but harder is no harder when you're aching all the time.

 

 

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Blupa    46
33 minutes ago, Giora Tal said:

Hi all, hope all is well.

I usually write lyrics once I have a basic melody and maybe structure. 

This is the melody track

 

Here is the first draft of the lyrics, what do you think?

 

Maybe it's the weather, 100 of raindrops in your heart.

They say it would get colder but you haven't felt warmth in a very long time.

Wake up every morning, and you feel like you left something behind

They say it would get harder, but harder is no harder when you're aching all the time.

 

 

 

 

The melody track is promising. I like it. Not sure if I understand the meaning of "100 of raindrops in your heart". And the construction is a bit unclear, A-B-B-B?

-Geir

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Giora Tal    5
2 hours ago, Blupa said:

 

The melody track is promising. I like it. Not sure if I understand the meaning of "100 of raindrops in your heart". And the construction is a bit unclear, A-B-B-B?

-Geir

Thanks, glad you liked it.

I'm not sure about the "100 raindrops in your heart" I think I was trying to describe raining as an emotional storm, does that make sense?

 

The lyrics are actually only the first verse. I'll upload the track with the vocals so you can listen to the structure. I'm aiming for A-A-B-C for now. 

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