The boy who fought the world

[emptylane]

The boy who ate the world

Blessed was the day of the second week of June

When little Timmy shot out armed with a harpoon

It’s a nightmare of a battle in that satan cursed womb

Gametes of all sizes trying to put me in a tomb

Little Timmy grew so quick noone hardly saw

His battle wounds were to remain and left him wanting more

With hesitance his poor parents were looking round for schools

But none it seemed was all that keen to go against the rule

I’m sorry sir and madam but it’s simply not allowed

A boy of that rough nature will surely clear us out

A knife from Westside Story or a bomb from Vietnam

Nonetheless we do obsess this violence be banned

But thank the lord! For one headmaster bent the rules a tad

And with a cheque, a night in bed, their son a school he had

Now be good Tim and don’t you sin for Lord will smite your head

Oh will he now, well let him know I’ve had his wife in bed

First day came and Miss Mcgee asked the class a question

As they do the eager hands shot up in all directions

Timmy in an awful fright picked up his metal boot

And smacked Mcgee right in her face for rousing this salute

I have come I have seen but I will never conquer

A place this cruel with Communist rule why I wouldn’t bother

I hear this Lord packs quite a punch but he is not your worry

That wife of his is a bitch to please and will bang you in a hurry

Out he stormed through the gates only to be greeted

By sirens from a blue red car in which he was soon seated

Now readers don’t you fear this child for he is safely caged

And let this be a lesson for those of you feeling raged.