Fairygothmother69

Hi and thanks for your comments! The line you suggested changing I feel works as it is and keeps the rhythm going. I agree - 'bitch' and 'whore' aren't very poetic, but then again neither is heroin a subject you would expect to read a poem about!! Personally, having seen the whole story above unfold over a number of years, I can truly say that the words 'bitch' and 'whore' - although not very poetic - are required to get across the true gravity that such a substance can have on a person. Please dont take this as me not taking your comments on board - the points you raise are valid, however these are my true justifications for them FGM

Based on real events............. The Beast Within Swimming around in the sea of insanity, Our lives become linked - its all interplanetary, Words and names, people are such a bore, Your only excitement is screwing with the whore. Membranes of memories, kicking through the light, People used to tell you that your future was bright, But the swirling uneasiness that is your saviour now, Sends another dimension - the evil screaming cow. A never-ending circle of excuses and regret, The lies and the stealing and the hate and the debt, Dragging people down that would seem so uninvolved, Then along comes your whore and your problems all seem solved. Insufficient facilities but you forget to care, The whore is always with you, smiling in her lair, A flicker of the norm, just a technical hitch, Just a second later and you're dancing with the bitch. Not a strain of happiness remains within your marrow, The essence of a joke lies in the straight and narrow, Death is eagelry waiting, his cloak is wearing thin, But one remains your saviour - your bitch, your whore, your heroin.

Hey all! I have been writing song lyrics/poetry since I was a very small child and its something I love very much. My feelings havent changed, but as an adult, working to support a family I barely have time any more to write - thats why I have joined this forum. To ensure I MAKE time for something I enjoy so much. I have had a short story and poetry published and have a wide repertoire of writing styles. I prefer to write poems/songs that rhyme. Anyone who is looking for lyrics for their music I would love to try and help you out! Im going to post in the critique section now - any feedback would be appreciated! FGM