[I Love That I Hate]

I tried to do something a little different with this one, it may seem dragged on a little but I really like it

- rebel

I hate not having any patience

I hate the look in they faces

I hate waking up to freshly cooked bacon and feeling like its summer vacation

I hate that I can't do math equations

I hate that all I'm good at is rap and shaving

I hate how creativities dieing and it's contagious

I hate how everybody's mistaken

I hate a the expectations

I hate obligations and empty revolvers

I hate crooked cops with crooked glocks shooting at trapped ballers

I hate being big then getting even smaller

I hate politics and the value of the dollar

I hate not having any honour

I hate disappointing my father

I hate being sad and not being able to call her

I hate anxiety and my lungs getting full of water

I hate when sounds of happiness sounding like sounds of the slaughter

break

I love the sound of angels blowing wind in my ears

I love having no wheel and still being able to steer

I love being so lost that I can't even hear

I love taking off my mask and showing all my tears

I love long talks to make it all clear

I love new beginnings and knowing the end is near

I love driving off the peer and being scared of the fall

I love cold air making my goosebumps crawl

I love when everything dies after the summer and leaves the trees appalled

I love wondering where I belong or why I'm even here at all

I love dropping the ball

I love tears on my sleeves letting my know that I can feel at all

I loved her but I love that I can't call

I love to hate cuz without it I couldn't rap at all

Rebel

[Another One!]

Something that's really important in rap is to have an end goal to build on throughout you while verse. You have that but it'd be dope to see longer verses maybe something like 32 bars with some added complexity. Keep it up homie

[Death Hour Revived]

This shits dope man. My only critique would be to try to keep your rhyme scheme more consistent in the first verse. Maybe even try to use more metaphors and shit. But that could just be your writing style so I might just be talking out my ass haha. Keep it up homie

[2 Freestyles !]

I've been trying to work on my flow and content more lately and these 2 verses are what came out. Don't be scared to give feedback

This rap shits gunna make instability in my home/

Trapped in a curse, but do you think Davie Jones just let motherf*ckers go?/

If Mother Nature doesn't let the homeless miss the snow/ then the f*ck are the chances of not lettin' Mufasa hit the floor?/

Too many scars in my kingdom so the pen won't let go/

Little kids wondering if gettin' paid shows/

I'm just a kid lookin' for good grades to show/

Paintin' myself with no ears like Vincent Van Gogh/

Cuz I ain't hearin' shit about CEOs/

All I want is 300 entendres down low for where I'm goin'/

Murder an entire army with 300 flows so you can watch me roamin'/

The only rebel writer poet tryin' reunite the stars with his hands/

The moon ain't gunna light right after my palms land/

Cuz the night gon go to black from white after Aphrodite's rings get jammed/

Imma f*ck the whole universe up just like my earthly plan/

Make the planets my shadow after I let my wings span/

Show my crooked smile like the theory of man/

Spat excellence back into gods face before I ran/

Spat bars of fire like motherf*ckers locked up in Sudan/

Spat another 16 after I land about how's life's just tragic/

Saw a rabbit in my peripheral and chased him for his magic/

Just to show that my words ain't too drastic/

That I spit 5 stars and only write instant classics/

Rippin' emcees brains and let it ooze out like plastic/

Leave blood on my name against the grain even if it's too graphic/

Rebel

A shot to the time I only rhymed during the day to forget bout my gpa/

To when my parents asked what I was gon be and didn't know what to say/

To when I was halfway and still didn't know what to say/

Like "son what happened to gettin' paid?"/

Sorry mom but we have to see if rappin' lets my soul gets saved/

Cuz Imma spit till judgement day/

Till my skull cracks and my fingers break/

Till the bats fly out my brain and my cave caves/

Till after the ice age cuz hell gon freeze over before I worry more about my wage/

So pass me another rag/ cuz I just broke Daniels neck after my lyin' tamed/

Used his fur to get burned cuz a heart ain't got flame/

I shiver under the moon waitin' for a ladder so I can leave for as long as half my age/

Half my page/

For about half my rage/

To right my wrongs to make minimum wage/ for 5 days/

Just so they can see that breaking creativity equals no degree/

No room for A's and B's/

Enough to make you see that rappin' makes him happy/

Without a smile he just be a circle with 2 dots covered in yellow/

Coverin' his own ass just to run with the devil/

They say sinnin' is selfish desire so watch me sin on a societal level/

So sorry mom and dad but bury expectation with a shovel/

Cuz when I die my obituary's gunna say writer/rapper/rebel/

[L😕is]

Life's just a game and I'm looking for Lois Lane

Cuz she lost her super main and she's injecting to ease the pain

Yeah Clarke skipped out when she started to pick out baby names

Now he's gettin' brains from Halle while his x is trying to stay sane

How could he do that to a woman, leave her crying in the rain

Taking away her whole world when he felt the same

But on his planet there ain't no dames and if crypton was still around he'd f*ckin be ashamed

So now the s on his chest is stained and all he's just a f*ckin' coward in a cape

All the power in the world and still gettin' lost in fame

Turning his head from rape while Lois puts that anaesthetic in her veins

Mentally drained; thoughts of super baby's turning into super maybes and stocking up on lead

Cuz Clarks rolling with the crips tonight not stocking up on red

Her addiction is fed her world is dead

She's hanging the rope over the bed

Then the symphony stops and Lois Lane is dying over Clarke Kent

[V.3005 Verse]

Just wrote this verse to the picnic version of 3005 on Childish Gambino's new EP. It's written similar to the first verse he spits on the secret track that was found so it helps to listen it -rebel

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bliZBJ3tr4s

Young thing in Atlanta how you livin'

Young thing on her knees yeah she sinnin'

But she ain't winnin'

(Speed up) Made her cry I guess I ain't that good with women

Said what I meant girl I wasn't kiddin'

Didn't text her back when she asked me how I'm livin'

Sayin' she loves me "why don't you just give in"

Girl I'm to childish

The flights to your eyes will cause too much mileage then you'll just cry while I site here in silence

(Slow down)But she sings like "do do do do do dooo"

Gettin' lost in my mind again

I'll trade this pen for your hand and we can run away like kids again

I'll never make you cry again

You can be my Vicodin

[Immortality]

Just a 12 bar that I wrote, I've been working on getting a starting point in a verse then pushing a finishing idea at the end of my verses. Would appreciate some feedback - rebel

All I want is to live forever that's I always be askin god for immortality

Yeah all I hear is thunder when I scream; is that his way of showin me his animosity?

Or his way of denying me entry into Ra's philosophy?

My only wish but ironically I always be holdin my breath cuz this life could end in a heartbeat

But if I die I'm going to hell, or at least that's what she keeps tellin me

Like my souls going to gravitate down beneath like the devils who I'm gunna meet

Little does she know you need a soul for the Grimm reaper to reap

So god just keep me on this earth, I'm beggin' you just hear my plea

I'll even sacrifice my Clyde, give up my Bonnie just for neither of you to ever meet me

Homie I ain't scared to say my biggest fear be losing my gravity

I know I ain't the biggest believer in Christianity

I know that whenever I be a sayin' a prayer a motherf*cker be doing it selfishly

But promise me if I ain't worthy of this immortality that you can at least grant the capacity for a rebel to keep his sanity

[First Post In This Section]

Yeah this actually really helps, you blew my shit outta the water homie! Thanks for the feedback man I'll keep working at it

[First Post In This Section]

What's good everyone? I've been on sing stuff for and a while now and it's pretty dope to see a hip hop only section. This is just something quick that I write and some feedback would be cool - rebel

Yeah I'm just tired of shining bright so when I burn out just put me at the bottom of the sea

But the sad part is that I'm goin' in so blind that I don't know where Imma be

Getting to the gates so early, homie too bad I lost the p

Yeah I looked god in the eyes and I still couldn't even see

He just gave me a stern look, they told him that it was my time but he disagreed

He just pointed his finger in anger like I just took the fall for Eve

Then he just threw me away, let me fall in the Eve

No he didn't even recycle, he just threw me back into this world of transparency

He laughed and said "when you fall you're going back to the top cuz stars can't go under a tree"

Then put me on the peak and laughed while he stomped on the fallen leaves

Yelling that he's just crushin' my problems to give me some reprieve

Shakin' his fist at my right side so the devil on my shoulder would flee

Then he promised that he'll meet me for real one day, glued this pen to my hand when I didn't agree

Then he gave me his 10 digits, told me to call him if someone ever said my success be a monopoly

Gave me a direct line so I could reach him properly

Screamin' my heart into a speaker, yeah a rebel's prophecy

[Any Beats?]

What's good everybody? I don't have enough experience spitting over beats and I really think it would help my writing ability. I've tried making my own and wasn't successful so since there's so many talented people on here I was wondering if anyone has any dl links to any beats that I could spit over, thanks -rebel

[Short Rap Verse]

And different and indifferent aren't rhyming on purpose. I just like the wordplay, like "this bitch is different" but then "she'll make you feel INdifferent" see what I mean?

[Short Rap Verse]

Thanks for the feedback symphonious

[Short Rap Verse]

Thanks for the feedback guys

[Possible Bridge/hook]

Hahaha do you have any actual critique for this justsoulin?

[Possible Bridge/hook]

.....😓

[Possible Bridge/hook]

They say you are what you see in the mirror

Does anybody got a mirror?

They say you are what you fear

Does anybody know what I should fear?

They say you are only as deep as your deepest layers

Does anybody know how to find my layers?

They say you are as close as you make it to the peer

Does anybody wanna drive me to the peer?

They say sanity is the world and how you make it clear

Does anybody know how to make it clear?

They say that you are how easy you take in the air

Does anybody know how to take in air?

They say that you are what you fear

Maybe I am what I fear, maybe I shouldn't be here

[Rap Verse]

So I wrote this shit when I was drunk. I'm not sure if it has any quality so I'd appreciate some critique - rebel

Stopped in my tracks like this beat ain't shit

Like its nothing but really I'm starting feel it

Should I stay or should I split?

Don't pass me the broken pieces cuz they ain't gunna fit

Shits as separated as it gets, my souls gettin' lost in the pits

I want a different taste but I already got a chick

I could probably give her every inch, maybe make her feel this dick

But what would that say about my character? How much asshole would I transmit?

How many evil deeds does my conscience permit?

A quilt of bad choices too knit, forgetting about it like it doesn't even matter

Oh look there goes another step on the inevitable ladder

I hate the sound of my teeth when they chatter

I hate being nervous and having piss in my bladder

I hate these f*cking feelings of doubt making me sadder

I mean I wanna love her but will her heart shatter?

A motherf*cker as mad as the mad hatter

A dead brain in the head, a reservation in the life after

Dreams splattered; Homie I'm just tryin' too turn all this anxiety into laughter

[Short Verse]

Beat written too

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=azaj4WPdOcY

[Short Verse]

Written too Illuminate by Ab-soul

Yeah homie drive that whip, yeah homie lose that mind

Yeah homie empty that clip, yeah homie drop that dime

Yeah homie lose that grip, yeah homie fall behind

Uh

More pain than we can describe

Cuz we just gunna gravitate then facilitate our own demise

I heard you're here today but gone today, goodbye

You say it's great but it's the chance we take to feel what's good inside

My stability's outta sight, instability on my mind

f*ck the path that you're looking at, yeah f*ck what's divine

I'm kinda prone to fire cuz I already applied to heaven and got denied

They say good and evil are about to collide

I don't know what we doin' but I'm gunna lose my mind tonight

The fight is fixed, so f*ck it I'm not gunna fight

The illumination is too bright, yeah homie shine on my time

Crack that wrist, watch my light

Yeah show us how to shed some light on thought dark as night

Uh

[Freestyle]

Thanks I just wasn't sure. Thanks for the feedback

[Freestyle]

Thanks homie. Do you think if I took out "Rocking back and forth" it would read smoother?

[Freestyle]

Like superman trying too decompose 6 feet under/

I'm just making too many blunders/

Somebody pass me my ear plugs cuz it's getting too f*cking loud trying to hide from all this thunder/

Like "the world is yours too discover"/

Bullshit, this world is mine too recover/

Mine to runaway from, mine to lose in the gutter/

Like "stop all of this fake shit and just show me your real colours"/

Real colours? Homie I'm just a shell of existence/

Rebel stop ignoring all the the voices in your head and just listen/

But why waste my time on something that isn't?/

I put my heart into this shit and I ain't get nothing back, wait isn't that an addiction?/

A broken musician with a survivalist mentality/

Down in numbers like warrior with no calvary/

Lois Lane in between the sheets after Clarke dies crying quietly/

Can somebody just take away my anxiety and replace it with a little immortality?/

Rocking back and forth; nothing but a rebel just looking for some notoriety/

[Rap Verse For Critique (With Rhyme Scheme)]

No problem homie, I'd really like too see the finished piece

[Rap Verse For Critique (With Rhyme Scheme)]

I think if you put that line ending with gin at the end it would work. But I really like how it would flow if it was just the word "again". "Cart again" "cardigan" "green card again". Or even if you just said "the gin hit me hard again"

[Rap Verse For Critique (With Rhyme Scheme)]

I can see how it would look like the word "again is being used repetitively. But just from reading this I think it would sound good over a beat. But I would replace "Red gums, knee thumped, he hit me hard, bumpin." With "Red gums, knee thumped, he hit me hard again". I don't know I guess I just like the idea of using a really similar rhyme or even using an exact rhyme like the use if the word "again" with complexity. Keep up the good work homie