I've read a lot of posts on this website for the last few weeks but nothing really seems to help me with my problem.
I've been playing music for the last 13 years (I'm 26 now) and since I was 16 I've played in several bands. All those bands broke up eventually. Since the age of 17/18 I just wanted to go and try and do the whole music thing for real. I've been fighting myself through several bands / shows, etc. But I always ended up being the only one that really wanted it, like there was no way back. The rest just liked to have fun, and only put 50 % of their time in it. Maybe I scared them with my willingness to give everything up just to do the music thing, but I just wanted it so bad. There is really nothing else that I can do. I also noticed that it is extremely hard to do it here in the Netherlands. Everyone is so 'radio minded' over here. If you don't have a song on the national radio, or have a coverband your destined to play 50 dollar shows in bars for the rest of your life. At least thats how it feels like. (I was even that desperate that I started writing songs purely aimed for the radio, No succes of course) I'm trying to fight my way through for the last 10 years but without any succes. Now I don't have a band at the moment.
Now to the point:
With these bands I was always part of the writing process. I can come up with several parts a day, that I'm happy with. But thats my problem. Now that I'm alone I want to write songs for myself but I can only come up with parts. It drives me crazy. Sometimes just an intro, Other times if I'm lucky a chorus with some vocal melody, etc. But they all don't fit together. And in the end when I'm listening to bands I like I can't help but to compare them to my own material. That's when I think my material isn't as good as theirs. And I delete it, or save it on my harddisk.
This is going on for 3 years now, but I just want to play songs I like, but I just can't seem to finish one that I like. I also provide vocals for these tracks. I took singing lessons, and people say my voice suits the kind of style I play. But when I'm happy with a instrumental, and I'm trying to write vocals for it I always end up unhappy, because I think they are not up par with the bands I like.
Sometimes I think to myself. Why can't I release or be part of such a band of dedicated people (We're not talking U2 hear or something. As my writing goes I'm into pop (punk) rock alternative stuff, lots of American bands. (I'm also listening to softer and harder stuff but I think that summed it up quite nicely.) I would be happy If I only released one thing. I just can't seem to get out of this 'block'
Have some of you experienced something similar, or have any tips for me. If I keep going on like this I won't have anything released in 10 years from now.
Thanks a lot!