Weekly Challenge Mon 5th April.

[Steve]

This challenge is open to everyone. Submissions can be anything from a full song, a lyric, a poem or any other artistic form you may choose to submit.

This weeks topic is a newspaper story. Because of the sensitive issue, your respect is requested when penning your prose!

Help for Baghdad blast victim

That's it! You have a week to post up your efforts!

Good luck.

[Steve]

How are we doing then? Anybody up for this apart from me?

[john]

Hey Steve

Ooo a tough one right off the bat. I'll see what I can do.

Cheers

John

[McnaughtonPark]

I've started a lyric and have about three rewrites in it. I am currently stuck in a quagmire of a particular couplet and I actually enjoy the challenge. I realized that the article should be used for inspiration, if you can't relate to the subject matter, find something that inspires you from it. Medical science, family, cars, hate, there are a lot of avenues to cross in this story. I came back to read it again hoping for a lifeline out of the muck.

MP

[McnaughtonPark]

the couplet quandry is over, now I have to rewrite every section. Two weeks may keep the pace going, 3 days to choose a topic, and two weeks from posting it would be a little better than such a quick pace at one week. I think what I have now is better than what it was when first written, so the days have been spent working, and improving the lyric.

I love deadlines and working under pressure. Most procrastinators do. I also believe that for certain things, a little more time to polish the stone isn't bad.

Here is my lyric http://forums.songstuff.com/index.php?showtopic=13204

Edited April 11, 2009 by McnaughtonPark

[Steve]

I'm still working on mine! Struggling a little but I'll post it up this evening.

That looks pretty good to me Tom!

[Steve]

OK. Here it is. I am not completely happy with it! But the time restraints were an interesting challenge!

I Can't See The Point

The children scream in innocent glee

Chasing each other, one two and three.

Touching the shoulder then running away

Barely keeping excitement at bay

The elders are watching, the parents aware.

enjoying the moment of days without care

Running and laughing, skipping and jumping

Then sitting exhausted, hearts all a pumping.

But storm clouds are approaching

and the innocence will end

And a rain will fall

That could kill us all

So why must we pretend

And we can't see the point of it all.

And our dreams have been shattered

And thrown against the wall.

And we fear for the future,

and the lagacy we leave.

I wonder now, who sees the point?

A dark day approaches, soon to be here

Innocent bystanders, so unaware

Danger that's simmering, changing the day

blowing normality far far away

The fear and the mayhem, choking the air

A father and husband lost in despair

Holding her closely, shielding the hate

A world changed forever, a victim of fate

The storm clouds have gathered

And innocence has died

And a rain comes down

And we all could drown

'cause the politicians lied

And we can't see the point of it all.

And our dreams have been shattered

And thrown against the wall.

And we fear for the future,

and the lagacy we leave.

I wonder now, who sees the point?

Steve Perrett

[McnaughtonPark]

I like it Steve. It's hard to keep trimming it down. I actually ended up with two lyrics, very similar to each other. I'll bet the word "point" was interesting to work with. Let's see, what rhymes with point?

But, congrats on finishing this on time.

I like the rhyming structure, you avoided the pitfalls normally associated with AABB by the lack of rhyme in the other sections. I think it works great. For those who don't think rhyme is important, this lyric essentially shows how comfortable rhyme makes a lyric. I was looking for it to come back. Nice texture.

Serious topic tho' huh. Interestingly, we were drawn to the negative or difficult side of the article when there is a wonderful side to it too. I don't know why i did't write about the giving, nurturing true nature of the article but instead chose to focus on the horror experienced by this family.

Maybe it's a good thing that what we found shocking was the violence and not the caring.

Tom

[Steve]

Serious topic tho' huh. Interestingly, we were drawn to the negative or difficult side of the article when there is a wonderful side to it too. I don't know why i did't write about the giving, nurturing true nature of the article but instead chose to focus on the horror experienced by this family.

Maybe it's a good thing that what we found shocking was the violence and not the caring.

Tom

It had been my intention to take this from the incident to the hope, but I never could get to it! Again, the time constraint worked against me. I found I was forcing myself to revisit this when I was completely removed from any feelings of creativity! It was an interesting challenge! I shall be interested to see what John comes up with for this weeks challenge!

[McnaughtonPark]

Will there be another topic? Did anyone start something and not finish? How many considered writing or painting or phtographing something and was the time constraint too limiting for your chosen craft? I could see how a video would have taken a lot more time, or a painting, even a simple lyric was difficult to do. How much of that was caused by someone handing you something and saying "Here, let this inspire you."

For me, inspiration comes at different times. Things that anger me spark imagination easily, easier than things that move me to tears. I think I may be more practiced in expressing that side. Remorse seems easier than healthy pride, sorrow easier than happiness. How about you? What do you find expressed in your craft most often? Which emotion is easiest to express.

What if the challenge were to work on what doesn't come easy to you? What if you were challenged to write a humorours piece? The challenge is to make someone laugh. That's hard, I've tried.

After John posts his challenge, I'd like a go.

[Steve]

John?

[McnaughtonPark]

......wich brings up another point....

Edited April 20, 2009 by McnaughtonPark