Effortlessly

[McnaughtonPark]

Still trying to shake lose what's waiting to come out.  Just scribbles for now.

 

Effortlessly

 

Should I fall in love with a woman I know

Who holds such power over me

With an arm she can reach to the highest bough

Pull the shade from the autumn tree

 

Tossing the foggy veil around

Over unknown roads and beneath

Till the sun is up high o’re the rivers tail

Swift and light through the afternoon sheath

 

Stones cover more than the ground below

Clouds ever dim cool the breeze

Poorest of gales blow a good ship aground

Willing lost souls to the sea

 

Oh, but I’m falling in love, my love

Falling in love with thee

True is my heart caught defenseless all while

Falling so effortlessly

[Jakyla]

That's quite good. Flows nicely.

I like how you make the similarity between the aground ship and her influence over you.

Its seemless and smooth

[McnaughtonPark]

I have no memory whatsoever of writing this lyric, not a single word of it.  It gets corny at times but I do think it scans well.  I like the older style approach to the phrasing, and I wonder what I was thinking when I wrote it.  Sometimes I act like I’m someone else when I write, like a character in a book, and I try to figure out what they would be saying or singing about.  Does anybody else do that?

[Greg M]

On 12/26/2020 at 4:46 PM, McnaughtonPark said:

I have no memory whatsoever of writing this lyric, not a single word of it.  It gets corny at times but I do think it scans well.  I like the older style approach to the phrasing, and I wonder what I was thinking when I wrote it.  Sometimes I act like I’m someone else when I write, like a character in a book, and I try to figure out what they would be saying or singing about.  Does anybody else do that?

 

Quite a lot of my songs are written from the point of view of a particular individual, some relatively obvious like broken hearted lovers, but some more specific, like a man who is reflecting on the life of his friend who has just been jailed for murder, or a Roman legionnaire who is trying to get back to the safety of York after his legion has been defeated by Britons. It makes for quite an interesting change to do it. 

[Clay Anderson Johnson]

On 10/11/2016 at 4:24 PM, McnaughtonPark said:

Effortlessly

 

You said this is unfinished.  Is the last section intended to become the Chorus?  I would make sense based upon the title.

 

Also what type of accompaniment do you envision?  From the cadence and flow this seems like more of a piano than a guitar song.

Edited April 12, 2022 by Clay Anderson Johnson

[McnaughtonPark]

I think it was meant as poetry, I’m not a very good poet, they always turn out more like lyrics, except when I write lyrics I almost always have a melody going in my head while writing, but when I don’t, I figure it’s a poem instead.  I can also tell I didn’t edit it at all, just a rough take really.

[jhanover]

I think a little more adherence to a consistent rhyme scheme would make it a little stronger, a great start.