Shadow's Birth

[Jac]

l wrote this poem in 2016. l still like it so iv decided i'm going to try and put it to lyrics. l know the lyric direction l want it to go,  l want it less depressing lol, the challenge is to make it relatable. l'll work on it for a few weeks, if it's going nowhere, l'll put it back in it box lol.

 

Shadow's Birth

 

Moments lost in an empty room

dreams returned to mothers womb

understanding are just as dark

it's shadow watched and leaves it's mark.

 

But somehow light was always there

it's gentle touch as l prepare

to gather moments on pages white

give shadows birth, blood ink l write.

 

So shadows birth is joy to me

it's prison chains can be set free

celebrate it's gift it gave

no moments lost or kept a slave.

 

 

 

 

[jwhardinesq]

i like some of the images you have going here. a moment being kept a slave is interesting. for me, the rhyming is too on-the-nose and is distracting. i wonder if some slant rhyming would be a little more forceful.