Enjoying Your Own Songs

[Jules]

I've been wondering if this happens to anyone else, because it happens to me all the time.

I'll write a song and I'll think it's absolutely brilliant. I'll spend ages writing music for it and playing it all the time and I keep thinking to myself: "this is killer,"

And then a couple of months later I decide it's not good enough and I scrap it.

It's alright for the odd song, but when I'm scrapping pretty much everything I've ever written, (bar about 2-3 songs that I've always kept) it's getting a bit annoying.

So my question is really how can you stay passionate about songs you wrote years ago?

I've got a friend that moved away to England for a year due to his dad's work, (used to be in a small band together) and until he comes back and we can record stuff I said I would just keep writing.

It's been about 6 months now and I've written one song that I'd even considering recording.

Does this happen to anyone else?

[roxhythe]

Not really. The way I keep old songs alive is by performing them. I am my own worst critic--I can find fault with everything I did--and left to myself, I probably would not play any of them.

On the other hand, I get good reactions from people to a lot of the songs. Ones that get requested again become part of the Repertoire, no matter how I feel about them. It is the audience's opinion of what's "good" that counts, not mine. They want to hear it, they'll get to hear it. They're paying the gate fee, not me.

Joe

[Steve]

It could just be the familiarity of the song! When you buy a new album, you tend to play it to death! Then you get used to it and think it's not the dogs dangly bits after all! When you say you 'scrap' them, do you mean you just don't like them any more? Or do you physically erase them?

[AnneC]

My situation is a bit different in that I write a song and then present it to a group of others for performance. In the beginning I would disguise my name on the sheet music or leave it off entirely so that I'd get an unvarnished assessment of the piece. Now I don't bother.

But I find that while I'm writing it I get so sick of it by the time it's a usable piece that it takes a great leap of faith (and usually a deadline) to go ahead and take it to the gang. After I've heard them rehearse it, it starts to grow on me again.

[Alistair]

Well, if you keep writing a lot you are going to move on. So over time, you get less attached to the old and more attached to the new. Some people like some of my songs a lot more than I do and I like most of my songs more than most people do! Nonetheless, as Joe says, it is a pleasure to play a song that someone else enjoys, whether it is your own or someone else's. I never actually 'scrap' any of my songs but I do sometimes think how I could improve next time and sometimes have written a new song which I know resembles an old one but it better. At that point I probably won't play the old one again.

[Jules]

It could just be the familiarity of the song! When you buy a new album, you tend to play it to death! Then you get used to it and think it's not the dogs dangly bits after all! When you say you 'scrap' them, do you mean you just don't like them any more? Or do you physically erase them?

I mean I physically erase them, so they're unretrievable, unless I'veposted them on here of course.

You're probably right in terms of familiarity, but it can get frustrating - maybe I should just stop scrapping things all together, and maybe it'll come back to me.

[Nightwolf]

I never erase anything!! Which can bee just as frustrating. Remember that you are your own worst critic, like others have mentioned, people latch on to Songs of mine that I consider total carp and pass over what I consider brilliance, so it helps to remember that you opinion is tainted by your own view of it..

Tom tunesmith wrote his comments as I wrote mine, as usual wonderful Words of Wisdom from him..I often do the same thing and am often surprised at what floats to the top later on

[Nigel]

I´ve just gone back to listening to some of my songs that I did over 10 years ago, put the disc in a drawer and forgot about.

When I listened to them a month or so ago I was knocked out by them, which is very unusual for me as I can be very self critical and lacking confidence, but I thought they were really good. Okay no one else other than the wife does, but at least we do, well I think she does but you never can tell with someone as close as a partner.

Trouble now is that I´m wondering if I can do anything as good ever again! There you are you see, that lack of confidence thing again.

But in summing up, I would never trash anything. I found old lyrics in a suitcase I had forgotten about, some of them must be twenty to thirty years old and you know from just looking at them I can still remember the melody straight away.

It´s also true what others have said about writing, you have the words and tune going through your head all the time in your attempt at writing the song, it gets so catchy that you think its the best thing since sliced bread. So to go back to an old song and find you still like it is kinda refreshing I think.

[FinnArild]

I always think my own stuff is pretty good. If I didn't, I probably wouldn't try to make records out of it.

[Lazz]

... it happens to me all the time.... later I decide it's not good enough and I scrap it.... how can you stay passionate about songs you wrote years ago?

Hope it makes you feel better knowing you're not alone.

But I think being self-critical is very valuable.

There is much stuff I wrote from years ago that I find faintly amusing.

Mainly because it was crap.

But I learned from it.

(& then dumped it).

Since hitting my stride a few years back, I have songs that are good - and one that's great

So perseverance pays off I think - and you should just stop worrying and keep at it.

I find my own performances difficult to listen to. That's common, too. Even with the finest artists. I think because of the self-critical tendency we are always quite naturally aware of where we failed in our goals. Just have to get used to it I guess. And try to do better.

The greatest reward for me is hearing others perform our songs.

It's a real genuine thrill.

[Jules]

Yeah, I think I'm gonna stop scrapping them, and just store them on a memory stick or something out of the way.

Just a few days ago, I really regretted scrapping a song, and now I can't remember it.

I am glad I'm not the only one, I thought I might have some sort of low self-esteem disorder.

[AnneC]

I think if I were in your shoes I'd burn your songs to a CD and shelve them awhile when you think you're unhappy with them. Put them in the back of a drawer or the top of your closet. Hide them in among your winter clothes. Whatever. Then when you rediscover the CD, give it a listen and see what you think. It's possible you may decide it wasn't half bad! And it's also possible that you may come up with a whole new approach to the song or some small way of doing something that would make it work better. The whole point is to listen to it with new ears and the experience of a few weeks, months or even years more than you had when you first wrote it.