If

[beautifuldisaster]

If

My pen is bleeding on the paper,

As love is bleeding in my heart.

Each word's the bare truth -

Put these words to music,

Play this music on the strings of my soul,

If you don't tear them, I'm yours.

If you see me dying,

Will you hold my hand through this hell?

Will you save me like you did once?

You know where to find the way

To the temple of my hope.

And I don't know...

If only I had died tomorrow,

Would you've turned back time,

So that tomorrow'd never come?

And if I asked you

To kill me with your bare hands,

Just not with your indifference... would you?

I can't breathe the air of fear.

I'm suffocating... will you hold me in your arms

To chase the fear away?

Will you breathe life into me?

Will you forgive me the weakness of one day

If I'm your shield for all the lifetime?

If I could live an hour of your life,

Dwell in your inner world that's just your own,

I'd turn to real your most precious dreams.

And if you realize

I love you with each ounce of my heart,

Will you ever say goodbye?

[john]

Hey

I like this. It kept my attention and there is a definate feeling of tension through the poem. Nice one

I am however upset because a lyric I am writing has the line "bleeding my mind on a page" in it, now it'll look like I ripped the idea off! lol

Not to worry.

Cheers

John

[Da Prophecy]

This is impressive. It kept me reading which is hard to do due to my often-times short attention span. I could feel the emotion as I read which is what good writing does (I wish I could achieve this a little more often). Your first stanza is the best one to me especially because the first two lines give off an image that sets the tone for the rest of the piece. I also like it because it is close to an image I'm using in a song lyric I have been working on. Good job!

[beautifuldisaster]

Thanks a lot for responding!

[Guest aspecto]

i agree with everyone else about this poem

keep it up

[neoism]

while digging some old stuff....i found this very impressive....great stuff....

[Echappee]

Your word choices worked well.

Great work!