Alon Sharon - Music producer/songwriter

[Alon Sharon]

Hey everybody,

My name is Alon Sharon

I am a music producer/songwriter based in Tel Aviv, Israel. I wrote a ballad on my guitar and would like to get some feedback on it.

https://soundcloud.com/alonsharon/alon-sharon-miss-you

Lyrics:

Verse 1:

There's nothing else to say when it's all gone
Just the emptiness you feel when it's too late
Your'e the only one I ever loved more than myself
Just Remember this as time will go away

Pre Chorus + Chorus:

And you, I just want to lay my body next to you
Your'e gone and now I feel it too
I miss you, I miss you

Verse 2:

If you ever walked away from me, I couldn't be free
It's just who we are
There's so much I want to say, But I can't right now
It's just How I am

Pre Chorus + Chorus:

And you, I just want to lay my body next to you
Your'e gone and now I feel it too
I miss you, I miss you

Thanks in Advance!

[john]

Hi Alon

 

Welcome to the Songstuff family!

 

My comments here are only intended to help you, nothing else.

 

Songstuff is a large site, containing a lot of information created by a diverse member base. Posts are organised into categories to make it easier to find what you are looking for. Members tend to hang around the categories that interest them most.

 

Introducing who you are is a key part of getting to know your fellow members. So we ask that you tell us about you, your music skills and interests, your aims for your music and what you would like to get out of Sonstuff. Your introduction post also allows you to begin to meet people.

 

In a similar vein, we ask that you fill in your profile, answering questions, and your About Me page (which you can view like an artist / writer profile page with info about you, links to your music pages, your lyrics, include a YouTube playlist/video and/or a Soundcloud or Spotfy playlist.

 

For all critique we ask that you post to the most appropriate critique board (we have several). You are exepected to critique the work of others, after all you are asking people to take time to listen/read and analyse and comment on your work. It is ony fair that you do the same for others. Lack of experience or lack of time is not an excuse for not doing critiques. Everyone here started with zero experience at some point, so we get it. Members quickly spot those who skip giving critique or whose critique is something like "I really liked that". That is an opinion, not critique. If members think you are not treating the community fairly, they soon stop replying to your posts. I am sure you don't want people to get the wrong impression... which is a big part of why I am writing this message.

 

That aside, people who welcome new members and read the introductions are doing just that. They are not looking to critique. They may see a post like yours and at worst think you might be avoiding your obligation to critique the work of others. At best, they want to find out about you. My point is you are likely to get a very low response... and I don't want that for you. I want you to have an awesome experience here, getting loads of informed and useful feedback, be stimulated by good conversation etc.

 

You will need to have made 3 posts in order to post a new topic to the critique boards. So please consider posting a new introduction and perhaps reply to others, chat in the musicians lounge etc and then re-post your song to the draft song critique or song critique board (whichever fits best). I will then (if you want) delete this topic to tidy up. Just send me,  @Peggy, @Mahesh or @Lisa Gates a PM to ask us and we will be happy to help.

 

In terms of what is where, and how to use the community, this topic should be useful:

 

 

It doesn't take long to read and is full of useful info.

 

Welcome aboard!

 

Cheers

 

John

[John W Selleck]

Hi Alon,

Welcome, and what John said. Participating and sharing is how we all help each other and grow.