Hmmm...
It just really depends on what's on my mind lately. When I was with my ex fiance, my songs were, for the most part, upbeat. See, at that time, I was an instrumental artist. But the emotions I was feeling was somewhat reflected in the titles. But even still, the songs on my first record, unintentionally, reflected...a kind of upbeat feeling. Even the intense emotional songs were subconsciously played in an upbeat mood.
However, we broke up this January, instrumental work was not enough. I had to start writing and singing...just to get it all out. I had NEVER sang before, but I just had to to get things off my chest. At first, it was covers that kind of felt like I was feeling. At the time, I was filled with anger and questions. And the covers I started singing (which will probably never release, because I didn't know how to sing yet) reflected that. Possession by Sarah McLaughlin Black by Pearl Jam, Case of You by Joni Mitchell, and even originals of mine like the one called Bitch...all of these reflected what I was feeling.
Now that the fire has died down, and I'm recording my full length album, things are still on the more hurtful subjects. And it's been remarkably theraputic. This next album...oh boy is it gonna be a doozy. Not only is it my first release foray into singing, but the lyrical content...I think it's relateable, and the few who listen to it (I have almost no fanbase lol) will be able to identify with it. I've never written anything so real before. And if my ex hears it...oh boy lol.
Getting back on track here, oddly enough, it's only after I've suffered this huge loss and heartbreak, have I really been able to really...write. Lyrics and emotions just flow out of me...sometimes instrumental songs are enough, sometimes I need to sing it. I really enjoy listening to my own work, and honestly, some of the stuff inspired by recent events, is my favorite things I've ever done. I did a song called "Maybe Christmas"...it's simple, understated, loose in structure, but gosh, it feels so real to me you know? And I hope, if and when people hear it, it maybe helps them if they're going through something similar. My whole message with the next record is to target those who went through what I went through, and I wanna reach out and tell them it's okay...
IDK, I guess I went of on a f*cking tangent there huh? Um, tl;dr version, I find more enjoyment out of listening, writing and recording more personal songs. lol