McnaughtonPark

Mine come with melodies too, which are usually only used for writing the lyric. I don’t trust them when they come with the lyric, I do when they come with a beat track or some chords on the guitar. But, I get the biggest satisfaction when a songwriter finds a melody that never occurred to me before.

“Do not, however, use a rhyming dictionary. I knew a guy who did and his writing sucked.” I have to disagree. What sucks are lyrics where you can see the rhyme coming, you know it’s coming, you hate that it’s coming, you can’t believe anybody would use that rhyme again…ever, and yet…ugh, there it is. Believe me, our brains will seek the easy, familiar rhyme unless we work around it. Our brains know what comes next. Why, because that’s how it works. You know how to get where you are going because of familiar queues. The lyricist job is to show you something different when you are traveling along. So change your rhymes, change your adjectives, try not to use absolutes, always, never, and throw away all the just’s and really’s. Fill those missing words with something more, rework the line , choose to change the trope. I end up disliking all my lyrics after a while, unless they’ve found music. Music and melody are great equalizers for bad lyrical choices. Especially melody. But, a new setting or story can also carry its share of poor rhymes. Our brains are also on point to find the anomaly, the new scene, the wrong note, or the unfamiliar. it’s difficult to write away from the comfort zone. It’s dangerous and exposes vulnerabilities. that’s uncomfortable. An undetermined effort will eventually concede to the safer, easier write. establishing rules for your writing is a good idea. It’s hard to tell sometimes what inspires a certain lyric. Sometimes words come out and bam, next line rhymes, and you like the melody, and before you know it, there’s verse one. But what have got there, where is it going? More than likely it’s the hook of the song. You’ve started with the hook, the refrain, maybe managed the whole chorus, so more than likely this is what you want the song to point out and now you have to build the verses to lead into the point you’re making. But hold on, I said I wasn’t going to write anymore being the victim lyrics, or you left me lyrics, or whatever. The rules were designed to help you change the trope. Look at what you have, can it be used to help you? If not, throw it away. one rule that’s helped me is to not be afraid to start over. Delete the partial lyrics off my phone. See what comes next, a word, a connection, an observation. I’m continually looking for new hooks. The hook is the core of any lyric.

This is the lyrics form, perhaps the songwriting forum would be a better place to ask.

You made loving fun

Welcome Leo, critique is a tool widely used here.

Welcome, and good luck with your search!

Welcome Mike, had to look at the Badlees website. Cool story. mp

Merry Christmish!

Really enjoyed that, merry Christmas Steve.

You show me a successful person, I’ll show you someone who’s very busy, lol.

Did any songs find their way to the radio then? Been a while since you posted so I was curious.

Suit from 1972, displayed in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

I’ve always only posted lyrics and songs here on Songstuff. My measurement of success has pretty much been how well they were received here and as a lyric writer, whether a lyric ever moved a musician to collaborate with me. If I measure success by the gratitude I feel, I’d have to say all those collaborations were the most successful. I did go look at my topics to see which had the most views and was a bit surprised to find my lyric collection came in first place. I haven’t posted to it for a couple of years tho, so it may be time to get it up to date. But what really surprised me was what came in second. If I Were A Ship, one of my first songs. I bought a guitar and started playing, I bought pro tools, a mic, and an interface. I used to sit out back on the patio at night strumming and putting my fingers who knows where to string together chords, if that’s what they were, and i started singing. One night, after playing enough to have the song down, I managed to get through the whole thing without mistakes, a neighbor I didn’t know and couldn’t see started clapping. That was it. My biggest success. Hearing the applause of a single, impromptu, unknown audience of a stranger coming out of the darkness. I’ve never wanted to be a performer, and wouldn’t have been if I had known they were listening. In a way, that experience is similar to getting views and responses to posted topics. I don’t know who reads them, but they took the time to do it. Some would reply, most didn’t. I’ll bet none knew they were helping me measure my success.

Crash into Me - Dave Mathews Band

Hey David, what’s up? Looks like you’ve been busy. Good to (almost said see) hear from you again!

Nowadays they don’t play the song on the radio without some obscene edit, and the edit is worse than the swearing. personally, I have a real f*ckin problem with the fact that Star Star by the Stones isn’t played anymore, at least in the States. I love that f*cking song.

I managed to finish one project of my own, making it two bikes this year. Yay!! This was a 1977 Honda XL75. I bought it, in rough shape, a few years ago and planned to restore it but the old Honda parts for it are scarce, and if I did find what I needed the price was too steep. I decided to go with a one off build, sans the parts everyone thinks are so valuable. Lol, jokes on them, this puppy is a blast to ride!

That is a 1981 KZ440. On the seat is a photo album we put together of various shots taken during the build. Fun stuff.

And his sons reaction….

Okay, that’s weird, I see it. Let me try it again here

I’ve been gone for a while now, had to finish this build so a friend could gift it to his son on his wedding day.

I’ve only read through the lyrics with this is mind, but maybe something like, ” I don’t want to deceive you when I say, there’s more to come.” I get what the lyric does by not having the line, leaving it open, holding back. I think that perhaps, the technique works better in the 2nd bar or third, probably second. you wouldn’t really know it was missing in the first, and in the fourth it may need a longer set up, and perhaps a build up then a drop in the beat to emphasize it. that in all theory and conjecture, but you made me think, so thank you for that.

Holy cow, I don’t think I’ve ever heard you play like that. There’s no love it button but I would choose that one. lyrically, some trimming? After the last line of the chorus, “when I say”, I wanted the first line that follows it to be, I don’t know, the hook I guess. “When I say” feels like a set up for a hook, and not the hook itself. im looking for the meaning to what I’m trying to say, I think about it often, we have it too easy. Electricity, light switches, ovens, running water, air conditioning, it ain’t a tough life.

And the line of her stocking disappears up under her skirt? The line he was chasing disappeared up under her skirt

Hit it brother!