DonnaMarilyn

Hi Rudi, Thank you for your observations. My responses are below. Donna

Jan, thank you so much for your comprehensive comments. I've responded below.

Has each lyric been split into its own topic yet, John? I can't find the two that I'm meant to critique. (Unless I'm missing something, which is always a possibility. ) Donna

Here's my effort. (Goldy, well done on the vocals. Singing a cappella takes courage - it's like standing naked in a bar. ) Donna Hard As Diamonds V1 Girl, you smiled and promised You’d be with me all the way And I leaned down to kiss you Thinking there’s still time to play V2 Girl, I knew your bound’ries Glad of just how much you cared But went ahead and pushed them Risking everything we’d shared Pre-chorus When you left I couldn’t blame you Knew I’d hurt and shamed you Chorus Hard as diamonds were the words You threw at my illusion They cut through the delusion I’d had about myself and love Hard as diamonds Making my stupidity crystal clear V3 Girl, I can’t help hoping One day you’ll return my calls Until you do I’ll wait here Like a ghost within these walls Pre-chorus When you left I couldn’t blame you Knew I’d hurt and shamed you Chorus Hard as diamonds were the words You threw at my illusion They cut through the delusion I’d had about myself and love Hard as diamonds Making my stupidity crystal clear Bridge You left your favourite book behind Might that mean something more? Now I sit and watch the door Chorus Hard as diamonds were the words You threw at my illusion They cut through the delusion I’d had about myself and love Hard as diamonds Making my stupidity crystal clear © 2013 Donna Devine

Hi Lisa, All's well, thanks. I took a few months' break from songwriting, which included spending August in Canada. I needed to recharge my batteries. Thanks for your comments on my 'Red Hot Mama' effort. I've decided though to try something from scratch if I get time this week. Donna

That's excellent, LC. You'll do wonderfully then. Donna

Folks, if any of you are feeling the need of a little inspiration as we approach the usually dull month of February (February being to the year what Monday is to the week ), you might want to take part in the annual FAWM challenge, beginning February 1st. The official goal is to write 14 songs/lyrics/instrumentals in 28 days, but it's a personal challenge, not a competition. Thus, it doesn't matter whether you write one song/lyric/instrumental or 14 (or more). Imagine 28 days of inspiration, motivation, delirium, hilarity, and insanity, and ending up with the most amazing results. The forums are heaps of fun, with people commenting on each other's work (not critiquing, simply commenting, praising), and inspiring one another to further greatness. A lot of collaborating takes place as well, so it's a tremendous way to link up with other composers and/or lyricists. The goal is not to post finished products. The revising and polishing up can be done after FAWM. The aim is simply to get something down, so that you wind up with at least one more lyric/song you wouldn't have done if you hadn't joined the challenge. The site's being revamped at the moment, but will be up in the next couple of days. In the meantime, you can join the Facebook group or send an email to be sent a notice of when the site's active. http://fawm.org I hope to see a few of you there. Donna

I'm a lyricist, not a musician, but can sympathise with how you feel. MotuKothu has made a good point. Try to stop agonising. Step back from it for a while. Don't compare yourself to other bands. Look at linking up online with collaborators: for instance, have a listen to some of the songs on this site and contact the writers. Post to the collaborations section. Maybe post something you've done and ask for collaborators to help you finish it. You might even consider taking structured songwriting classes, e.g. at http://www.songu.com. I've been a member there for a couple of years, and highly recommend it. Something else that may be interesting and motivating is the FAWM (February Album Writing Month - write 14 songs/lyrics, etc. in 28 days) challenge that's due to start on February 1st. Twenty-eight days of inspiration, motivation, delirium, hilarity, and insanity that always has the most amazing results. It's a personal challenge, not a competition, so it doesn't matter whether you write one song/lyric/instrumental or 14 (or more). Quite a few folks from the Netherlands usually take part as well, so who knows - maybe you can link up with someone there. Did you know there's a strong songwriter's group in Amsterdam, whose goals - I believe - are not necessarily radio-oriented. Here's the FAWM link. http://fawm.org The site isn't open yet (it's being revamped), but you can join the Facebook group or send an email to get notice of when it opens. (It will be up in time for February 1st.)

I often - in fact, usually - write verses after the chorus. But that works for me because by the time I have the chorus down (and it generally gets revised), the story's theme is already clear in my mind. I know the 'who', 'what', 'when', 'where', 'how', and sometimes 'why'. You might try the 'storyboard' method. Set out your 'plot' in sections as clearly as possible. Don't rhyme anything. Simply state what you want to convey to the listener. Once you have the basic details in order, you then work at crafting it into a lyric (with rhyming, metering, poetic devices, etc.). Here are a few basic tips. http://www.ehow.com/...rite-lyric.html I highly recommend you get hold of a couple of good books on writing lyrics. Anything by Pat Pattison, for instance, or by Sheila Davis. A good beginner's manual is 'Songwriting for Dummies' by Peterik, Austen, and Bickford. 'Writing Better Words for Your Song's by Rikky Rooksby is also a good reference book. Once you know the difference between a chorus and a verse - and the separate function of those sections - it will be easier for you to write either. If you're truly serious about learning the craft of songwriting, check out http://www.songu.com. There's also a free 6-week course starting on March 1st with Pat Pattison on https://www.coursera...versity/berklee Be sure as well to examine very closely a number of lyrics from your favourite songs. Observe how those authors achieved the effects they wanted. Remember too that Google is your friend. Plenty of material there about writing verses. Donna

How about starting with the verses, since they basically contain the story's details and progression. Then focus on the section (the chorus) that will support what's happening in the verses. Donna

Dan, if I understand you correctly, you're referring to repeating something that's already in a section of your own lyric, is that correct? In the example you give, the similarity isn't that strong. However, it's advisable to try to avoid using the same words or phrases that have already been used in a section. The idea is to give the listener's ears something fresh and new to fall on. For instance, to avoid repeating "cry" you could have something like "that night when I saw you in tears". Donna

There might be something in this section of the forum. http://forums.songstuff.com/forum/119-songwriting-and-recording-collaboration/ Donna

Jena, here's a link that might be of interest, at least for an overview. http://musicians.about.com/od/beingamusician/a/band101.htm Donna

This link might be helpful, justsoulin. It states exactly what TuneSmith does. http://www.rhymegeni...m/features.html Of course, not everyone needs or wants that level of functionality. Donna

By the way, Bojo, I think that price of $40 might have referred to the hybrid DVD for RG and TS that works on both a Mac and Windows.

That's certainly odd, Bojo. I was in contact with them 3-4 days ago. First I purchased RhymeGenie (for $25). Then I got an email to say that I'd soon get the code to fully unlock RhymeGenie. After that he wrote "You can also download TuneSmith for free and simply register TuneSmith with your email address". If I were you, I'd contact the site aministrator(s) and ask about the situation. support@idolumic.com Donna On this link, it says you can run TuneSmith free of charge on as many computers as you like. http://www.rhymegenie.com/tunesmith.html

Bojo, if you purchase RhymeGenie (ca $25), you can then download Tunesmith free and register it with your email address. That was the information I was given by the site administrators.

Bojo, you might like to look at RhymeGenie. http://www.rhymegenie.com/download.html A very extensive rhyming dictionary, and you can download a free programme called "Tunesmith" for creating and managing your songs (if that's what you want to do). Donna

Just chiming in on the topic of copyrights here: I joined this organisation. http://www.copyrighthouse.co.uk. There are a number of payment options, ranging from yearly to lifetime. I opted for lifetime, as it cost much less than what I used to pay annually to File-Reg, a copryight registration agency of which I was a member. Now - at no extra cost - I can upload and register for copyright as many lyrics/songs as I want for the rest of my life. Donna

Excellent article. Thank you. Informative, practical, and motivating - all in one shot. As regards research, I've snagged several - at least to me - good title/hooks from sites like http://www.postsecret.com and http://www.dearoldlove.com. Occasionally, I've found gems (or rough diamonds that I altered a little) using the Translator function at http://www.leonatkinson.com. Donna

I don't think today's music is necessarily all VCVC. A lot depends on the genre. Though used in the past perhaps more often for theatre/musicals, the AABA format has had a place in more contemporary songs as well. Besides, there's a certain amount of leeway in the structure. It doesn't need to follow the hook/title-in-the-first-and/or-last-line format. And you can extend it as well to AABABA, ad infinitum. Perhaps a distinguishing characteristic is that the AABA format is generally an expression of one moment's feeling. Hence - as I understand it - the time frame, the viewpoint, and the setting in the A sections remain unchanged, while the bridge can go in a number of directions in contrast to the verses. If you feel the song is good, why not see whether you can place it somewhere. It might find a niche in the film/tv genre, for instance, where songs generally need to be more generic/universal, and deal with emotions in a current situation rather than tell the kind of forward-moving story one most often finds in the VCVCBC format. Perhaps post the song in the Song Critiques section so that people can comment. Donna

Lyrics first. Always. I don't play an instrument. However, I often find that as I'm writing (or revising) a lyric, a distinct head melody emerges. I use this as a vocal guide, mainly to indicate phrasing, but my co-writer sometimes uses it as the main melody. Composers occasionally ask me to write lyrics for their music. If the piece has a strong, well-defined melody, I can usually do this. It's helpful too if the composer also has a story theme. If he doesn't, I simply go with the feel of the piece, and the emotion that it elicits. A really compelling piece of music will generally conjure up a story in my imagination. Sometimes, though, the Muse simply won't budge. Donna

OK, I've decided to use my Facebook account more. Please add me to your 'like' list. http://www.facebook.com/donna.devine.3994 I've already 'liked' several of you, and will carry on up the list.

Sadly, I lack the self-discipline to teach myself. I do have a guitar - two of 'em in fact. But it's my keyboard that I intend to work on in the coming months. Even if only to painstakingly plonk out a melody now and then.