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  • 3 weeks later...

...  catching this moment of NOTHINGNESS:

 

I think i have a Borderline Personality and i am not certain of really anything.

It is ok, i dont need to...

unless somebody pushes me to talk, when i feel blocked...

and it was yesterday at evening/and night. I was at my friends home...

classica.

He is one of my friends, that keeps on freezing my mind and i just cant talk at all.

Everytime i talk with him, i feel idiotic, because i hate myself.

DOes it make a sense? 

It doesnt matter, i am used to this.

And i think i am both happy, and sad mostly...

i can enjoy my day...

but there is something wrong in here. In this reality .

There is something seriously f*ck** up with me people. 😕

OR i am completely allright, and i just have a terrible luck?

I dont know nothing at all. 

 

i just hate this state of being...

Edited by Richard Watashi
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1 hour ago, Richard Watashi said:

sorry i didnt want to f**k your mood people. but hey, i am only f****d up so what can i do?

 

3 hours ago, Richard Watashi said:

...  catching this moment of NOTHINGNESS:

 

I think i have a Borderline Personality and i am not certain of really anything.

It is ok, i dont need to...

unless somebody pushes me to talk, when i feel blocked...

and it was yesterday at evening/and night. I was at my friends home...

classica.

He is one of my friends, that keeps on freezing my mind and i just cant talk at all.

Everytime i talk with him, i feel idiotic, because i hate myself.

DOes it make a sense? 

It doesnt matter, i am used to this.

And i think i am both happy, and sad mostly...

i can enjoy my day...

but there is something wrong in here. In this reality .

There is something seriously f*ck** up with me people. 😕

OR i am completely allright, and i just have a terrible luck?

I dont know nothing at all. 

 

i just hate this state of being...

 

great write! make it a lyric :) that's how I cope, that and telling myself(which usually turns out to be true) it's not me, it's them,  that has their head/thoughts/emotions and prerogatives all f*cked up.   Just finished this little thing with no words yet if you don't mind me stealing yours and chopping them up hahaha.....hmmm.mp3.....it's got some in another iteration of it, but hey if you can't rip off yourself hahahah :D

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yeah got chopped and dirtied up anddzd-Half of Nothing- corpse segment1min.mp3 stuck into next corpse thing, even got some recycled lyrics from years ago :) 

 

will probably not stick with those lyrics, they go elsewhere as a chorus on something else I need to actually redo, or who knows :D not me haha,

 

can't really tell so much other going on in there, but acoustic is nashville tuned up, been enjoying it. 

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3 hours ago, Patchez said:

 

I like the premise, the track.

The upbeat-ness with those lyrics pushes it into the pop realm... not were I saw this going.

 

I'd like it upbeat, but singing appocolyptically about death and destruction and Oregon and Washington... and all that fun stuff ;) hahhh! Or, trump and biden... or other lives matter things... :) 

"Oregon and Washington, the countries I long for,
When Communist States finally unite,
And the Rushing Chinese say that they might,

Deny all the real ones that Joe Biden tore... "
 

Or similar krappe starting stuff, lightening rods  :asshole:  Just for the fun of it, uNo?!
 

 

 

 

 Look at that auto corrected ? "Nice" to " i " ? oh, my... hmmm

 

Oh well.

 

You know I happily rebel and reject proper spelling, grammar and idiomatic phrasing, and have wipe my ashe with my advanced degree(s)... but even " eye " don't spell like that :) 

 

Good God... what's happening hear!? :) 

 

Yeah I was 2nd in line, it fits pretty well with the 10s snippet I got...........and was another of that guys really upbeat songs, about really dark thoughts hahah, should be a nice contrast :) We were even almost playing same chords hahah........yeah still don't know what I'll "actually" do with that..........those lyrics have a home already elsewhere as a chorus on some old stuff haha never a problem unless I start suing myself hahahah

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, I finally got our first issue of my newspaper out last week. I was able to give a nod to my favorite band Cheap Trick in my column I wrote. It's been a long rode these past 6 months.

 

https://www.timesnewspapers.com/webster-kirkwoodtimes/1-hello-there/article_dca9b2fc-fe6b-11ea-936c-3bd557d9733a.html

 

I also pasted the copy of my column below this image for those outside of the US that can't access our site.

 

Peace - Randy (Just1L)

 

large.cover.jpg.74bc92bea6b3a443ed3ef4d16aaf367f.jpg

 

1. Hello There

A word from publisher Randy Drilingas

 

Hello there ladies and gentlemen. Are you ready to read? I hope so! It’s been quite a while since readers have had  a chance to sit down, relax and hold a printed version of the Webster-Kirkwood Times in their hands. I hope you enjoy it.

I’d like to take a minute to introduce myself as the new publisher. I grew up in Sappington, attended Lindbergh Schools and graduated from Lindbergh High School in 1988.

I met my wife, Shannon, at Southwest Missouri State University, now Missouri State. She is a preschool teacher in Webster Groves. I have two sons: Josh, a senior at Webster Groves High School; and Casey, an eighth grader at Hixson Middle School.  

The time between the last printed issue  on March 27, and this newspaper, dated Sept. 25, feels like an eternity. I can honestly

say these past six months have been very stressful. Out of all the craziness, to be introducing myself for this first edition feels surreal. There have been a lot of ups and downs along the way and many, many sleepless nights.

I must admit though, the first three weeks without a job were very enjoyable. Sure there was the whole pandemic thing going on, but I was making the best of it. As a songwriter/musician, I was able to really get some things done. I worked on a music video I had been planning and then decided to write a Coronavirus parody song ... which was the style at the time. I was able to spend time with my wife and kids that I never would have had otherwise. They just repaved the roads in our neighborhood, which made for some great skateboarding. The idea of having more than one week off of work was exciting and things were going pretty well overall, but soon that all changed.

Before the Times shut down, I had mentioned to my boss that one day I could envision running the paper. It was something my wife and I had discussed several times before. So that’s why, a few weeks later, he informed me that the paper was going to be sold. Immediate panic set in. It was one thing to be out of work thinking there was a job on the other side. It was an entirely different feeling not having that safety net to look forward to.

I looked into the possibilities, crunched the numbers, made phone calls, thought about it, considered it some more and then came to the conclusion that buying the newspaper was simply too much to handle. I had to put it on the back-burner. The idea of it all was just too overwhelming.

So there I was, faced with no job and, despite being a graphic designer for over 20 years, no portfolio to even start applying for jobs. The search began for any and all design work I could find. I had a good amount of freelance work, as well as work I had done for the paper, and it didn’t take long to get going.

The more I worked on my portfolio, the more I came to realize that the Webster-Kirkwood Times wasn’t just my job and it wasn’t just a newspaper I had worked for. It played a larger role in the community — a role I never truly appreciated or understood.

The Webster Groves Community Days programs, Kirkwood and Webster Groves School District directories, Webster Arts Fair programs, Senior Expos, the Old Webster Jazz & Blues Festival sponsorship, and on and on. We weren’t only providing news to the community, we were a part of the community. I kept asking, “Who is going to do this ... or who will do that now that we’re gone?” It felt a lot more important to me than it ever had before.

Meanwhile, donations from readers kept coming in with all the comments saying they really missed us and hoped we would be back soon. I found that very interesting because in reality, we weren’t really gone, we were still online. But without the printed paper it just wasn’t the same. To many, it felt like we were gone. The emptiness of digital versus real was being felt by many.

At the beginning of June, Times employees received a letter from then publisher Dwight Bitikofer explaining that the newspaper was for sale. The letter also described a few scenarios for the future of the paper. Option #2  described the potential for a group of employees to step up and possibly purchase the paper. Who better to run a newspaper than those who had already been running it? Then all the possibilities began.

Employee A emailed employees B and C, and we met. Then B met with A to ask about D and ... well, you get the gist. A lot of thinking and quite a few meetings were had until eventually the final group came together. It just felt right. Each of us represented a different department and together we knew just enough to have the confidence to believe that, yes, we could do this.

I can’t count how many meetings we had. Some in my backyard. Some at CJ Mugg’s. Some at the Times office. Meet, get excited, feel overwhelmed, get exhausted, feel like calling it quits and then get excited again. Repeat for weeks. Eventually, though, we worked through it and were able to make an offer which was accepted.

Now the really hard work begins. For every aspect of the business one of us knows, there’s another 20 we don’t, but we’re whittling it down. We’re learning. Most of all, though, we’re ready to get this show on the road.  

I shudder at the thought of quality community journalism falling by the wayside. It is too important to fail, and I sincerely hope all community newspapers regain or retain their roles as the best source of information to those it matters to most — their communities.

We thank all the businesses who advertise and make this newspaper possible. We hope that all of our readers will support those same businesses. We look forward to being a part of the community once again, and embrace the opportunity to do so.

On a side note, the title of this column was taken from the first song on one of my favorite albums as a youth ... “Cheap Trick at Budokan.” It set the stage for their best selling album ever. Just this year it was selected for preservation in the National Recording Registry for being “culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant” by the Library of Congress. It is my hope that this introduction will help set the stage for many great years to come.

Thank you!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hi All,

Missed being on the board last couple of days. 3 weeks ago we adopted a beautiful shelter dog.  She's a smart, happy, sweet German Shepherd. Quite large and powerful.  We were on a walk and she got spooked and darted. I tried to hang on but.... well my shoulder is injured and i haven't been able to move. Today I can type laying down.. haha.. lots of ice and Advil and keeping immobile. 

 

The best thing is when I finally made it home she was at the back gate waiting for me. 

 

Hope to catch up with the boards some today..but still alittle tough going.

 

20201015_175455.jpg

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Hi Patchez,

You had lots of good experiences. 

 

Heck no, not an expert, but have recused many large breeds. Mostly Shepherd and Huskies. Some mixes, Huskie/lab, Shepherds/?, even a Shepherd/wolf(1/4). Oh my, and an Irish Setter and a long haired chihuahua.  She's a family dog it seems. Lost in one of these storms maybe or something.  I always say she's still looking for them.  But she is super sweet, loves to be around everyone that stops by.  For 3 wks she's doing excellent. 3 times a day walks, teaching her where she lives. She fits right in and not worried much about bonding.  And yes, my fault .. thought i could keep up but.. nope.. oh well.. :)

 

it was a metal standing lamp and shade that my neighbor had set out for special pickup.  It hadn't been there on other walks, turned down the alley heading home, there it was.. 

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@Peggy Sorry about the shoulder, but that is a really pretty dog! Smart and observant too, anything new or out of the ordinary and my dog gets a little skittish as well.  I moved his favorite chair yesterday(the only one he's allowed on because its crap and nobody else likes it) :D and he won't get in it now, just keeps giving it funny looks, maybe he just liked the spot?   Her coming back is a great sign usually the smarter the dog the longer it will take for them to acclimate.  Haha a lamp? she's afraid of the robot uprising as well 😂 can't blame her for that one!   I had one border collie that moved with me a lot it always took her a month or two at any new place before she would calm down and stop jumping/growling at anything new, sounds similar to what she did, she'd be okay the first time she got to investigate things, but if something changed immediately(different car outside/etc) she would growl and basically trip me up trying to get between my legs, it was quite embarrassing her actually knocking me over a few times and that was with me around and I had been the only human she had ever had much contact with, so it just may take her awhile.  Hope it works out!  

 

I had a friend that had a whole family of huskie/wolf mixes, super smart and loyal almost to a fault, but just sweet playful 150plus pound fur balls as long as he was around.  I knew them for 5 or 6 years before I would get out of a vehicle before he came outside first.  :D They would eat dog food, but mostly just hunted up their own.  

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3 hours ago, Patchez said:

 

Ah, yes ;) I run like hell when I see a lamp too, or spot light :)  

Wonderful. 

I actually think dogs are aliens, sent to study us, and one day, one's gonna "speak up" and say something..., still waiting 🙊 [smiley=SHOCKED2.gif]

There's a Kurt Vonnegut short story about a guy who worked for Thomas Edison creating a device that could measure true intelligence.  Thought it was broken when the shop dog was the smartest thing in a room full of "geniuses" , the dog later spoke to the guy, said yeah of course we're smarter than humans we did talk you guys into taking care of us didn't we, now get rid of that machine and I'll tell you how to get that lightbulb to work longer :D   

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On 10/28/2020 at 9:03 PM, Patchez said:


 

So, did you ever get that all straightened out? 

Got a demo?

 

 


Nah. I almost never record covers, and only occasionally perform them at gigs. I learn them just for the learning and because of my love for the song. As a songwriter I just don’t see the point. 
 

The only reason I can see for recording a cover is if I bring something pretty unique to the song. Which is fine. I am creative enough to bring something unique to the performance of something if I put my mind to it... but I have to want to work that out, approaching the song with the intention of recording and performing it.

 

Generally, If I am just approaching from a learning perspective, I am deliberately trying to reproduce, capturing what interested me in the first place, not trying to find a new perspective. That might be okay for jamming a track with a mate, or strumming a track at a party, but to record a track or play it on a stage, I have to be very sure my version is unique enough, and my performance is good enough to justify it. It’s a lot of time to invest in a song, and to be honest, I would far rather invest that time in an original. 
 

That aside, a track like Ramble On needs to be very different to avoid the obvious vocal comparison, and I know only too well that Mr Plant would wipe the floor with me vocally. The trouble is, I think the Zep version is awesome. It doesn’t need a new version by anyone else, let alone me.
 

That is often the case with covers. To justify doing a version of any song, you have to find a song that is awesome enough as a song, but the arrangement or performance is lacking something. Couple that with still being motivated enough about the cover song versus devoting that time to an original... and that is why I don’t record covers!

 

Going beyond that, you have to think what you will do with that cover. If you post covers to Facebook you can get your page shut down, especially right now. If you post to YouTube, they can close your channel. You might have got away with it a few years ago, but nowadays it is just trouble waiting to bite you in the ass.

 

So if you are going to do it, it has to be a full on, approved cover version (which it should be anyway), and that goes back to investing time, money and reputation in a cover versus an original. I know where I prefer investing my efforts.

 

Lastly, I would far prefer being the best version of myself than a second rate copy of anyone else. So I don’t do covers. I learn a song to improve my skills in writing, arrangement, production or performance, or a little bit of fun away from the spotlight, but that is it.

 

For those who love playing covers, good for them. We all have our joy. It just isn’t mine :)

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1 hour ago, john said:

Nah. I almost never record covers, and only occasionally perform them at gigs. I learn them just for the learning and because of my love for the song. As a songwriter I just don’t see the point. 

 

I rarely if ever do any myself, for pretty much all the same reasons you mentioned, but have done a ton this month alone, only spent more than an hour or so from learn to record on the couple captain beefheart ones I did and that was just from so many different instruments used and having to layer it all in, it's mostly just been banging out a root chord progression, mostly the wrong one I'm sure, but close enough for hand-grenades, horse shoes, and covers :D  

 

I feel its not much different than being in a band and learning or making up a part, I've always treated and viewed that the same way, hey its not "my" song,  and I'm more apt to personally learn more about my own recording "process" just because I won't be scrutinizing every little could of would of should of like I do if I happen to listen to my own stuff.  If I don't like it, hey not my fault........ they should of written it better :D   but yeah I personally don't see the point in myself either wasting time learning something super complex note for note, even if "ohhh look how fancy I used a minor here instead and changed it all up" type of things :D , but yup yup to each their own and all that good stuff!  

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