Opinion On My Lyrics?

[sara2cena]

 I was bored so I decided to vent haha. Feel free to rate, and criticize.

 

Title of the poem: Attention

 

What's the point of craving attention?

When it just leads you to another dimension,

Be confident, be strong, and believe in yourself!

Believe you're at the summit of any shelf.

 

Continue to have class & morals,

For those two principles are gone,

Be less fake & more floral,

Like the innocence of an orangy dawn.

 

The classic style has vanished,

Like the transparent thin air,

"The good people must be banished!"

Said the insecure people with despair.

 

Right now, you may seem really "cool,"

But that's just for a temporary time,

Everything will glide like drool,

As I continue to finish this rhyme.

 

Listen to me, just listen to me,

For I speak the truth,

Lies will appear, you shall see,

Everything will destruct rather than sooth.

 

Are you hypnotized or convinced?

By the words that I preach,

Are you satisfied, dear prince?

You got the shore, you got the beach.

 

Dive in & kill yourself,

As the waves finally devour you,

What's the point of crying for help?

There's no way out, no matter what you do!

 

 

                                                                              Thank you.

 

[cassidyjames]

I get a real sense of desperation at the end, you write 'what's the point of crying for help?' but make nods to taking significant destructive action metaphorically ('dive in & kill yourself, as the waves finally devour you') as to get noticed. I sense your anger in this piece and think that poems like this are important to vent your frustration. Good job.

[Lyriclady]

You were definitely attacking something(one) we couldn't see. Well done!