“One Gas Station†is recorded and posted; link is http://www.soundclick.com/share?songid=11400173 Problems with Audacity (my first time trying to use it to record stuff rather than just modify it), so I used the Tascam. I think the Tascam’s buzz was coming from the “effects†unit, so I left that turned off (except when I wanted the guitar to “emulate†a bass) and used Audacity to boost the volume afterwards. The old unit may be usable yet.

For the video (I am trying to “think video†for every song), I’d like to shoot a bunch of photos of little Dodson, Oregon (pop. 50), birthplace of the Dodson Drifters. There is virtually nothing left of the town now, since the Forest Service bought most of it for the Columbia Gorge National Scenic Area after 1986—but the gas station, the 3-room schoolhouse, and Big Bob’s café are still standing (sort of—they’ve all been vacant for years), along with a few homes. We really did go play music every night at the café when the power went out (and if you’re playing every night, you will become good).

A “woot, woot!†I think. Denise Drake wants to come to the Thirsty Lion in Portland and play lead (on accordion) at the gig Feb. 14. This could be tons of fun. She is very good, and an accomplished performer; yes, I know performance, too, but I definitely sound better when someone else is playing with me.

This does change what I want to play. With accompaniment, I’m doing fewer songs, because they’re 20% longer when there’s lead breaks. Instead of seven songs, I’ll have six, or maybe five. I can do songs that I don’t usually perform solo, like “Armadillo on the Interstate,†because they have to have lead breaks because of the phrasing. And songs where it’s possible to have harmonies (“Armadillo†fits in that category, too)—so the setlist should be songs with choruses. It should be easier to make sure the setlist is songs the Thirsty Lion crowd hasn’t heard before, since all my performances there have been solo.

I still would like to stick to the “all love songs†theme; the performance is on Valentine’s Day, after all. I made a list (I like lists), and of the more than 80 songs I’ve written, 24 are classifiable as love songs (I could have more, if I defined “love†even more loosely). I should be able to extract five (six, if they’re short) from that.

How about (not in order yet, of course):

Spend the End of the World with Me—ragtime (and short)
Armadillo on the Interstate—slow & sleazy
Rotten Candy—fast Gospel (and also kinda short)
Dead Things in the Shower—fast two-step
In the Shadows, I’ll Be Watching You—slow two-step

The above list has death, lost love, betrayal, and dead animals. Still need religion to have the complete list. What do I have that’s relatively slow, religious, and still a love song? And ideally not serious: this is a bar, and bar crowds don’t need more depressing music—they already get enough. And they’ll remember (sort of) things that were funny.

The retired Nashville guy and his wife came (finally) to the Friday Night Group. Impressive, he was. I was sitting next to him, and since he was raising the bar pretty high for performers, I didn’t try to do the new “One Gas Station†song; instead, I gave ‘em the old Gospel song “Turn Your Radio On†(with Carol Ackerman’s harmonies), “Lost Highway†(which everybody there knows) and my previous new song, “Spend the End of the World with Me†(which I can do pretty good and which for some reason nobody has trouble following). Distributed flyers for the Feb. 4 open mike at the Arts Center, too.

Joe

Modern social media is not ideal for many uses. This is especially true for bands and artists. From individual posts being missed and content you are interested in being buried beneath a pile of posts that you are not interested in, through a lack of people with suitable knowledge and skills, to not being able to find a vital piece of information posted 2 weeks ago and the lack of moderation making communicating frustrating, there's a long list of the shortcomings of modern social media.
 
Fear not! Music forums to your rescue!
 
Here is a list of 20 reasons why music forums are better for songwriters, bands, and producers to connect with each other than using social media.
 
Focused Community: Music forums are designed specifically for musicians, songwriters, and producers, which means that you'll be connecting with a community that is passionate about music and has a deep understanding of the craft. Niche Conversations: Music forums allow you to have focused conversations about specific topics related to music production, songwriting, and performance that may not be as easy to find on social media. Sharing Music: Forums offer an easy way to share your music with others who are interested in the same style or genre. You can post links to your music, receive feedback, and connect with other musicians. Anonymity: If you're not comfortable sharing personal details on social media, forums allow you to remain anonymous while still being able to connect with others. Professionalism: Music forums attract a more professional and serious crowd. You'll be interacting with people who are committed to their craft and are serious about creating quality music. More Focused Interaction: Social media can be overwhelming with the sheer amount of information, ads, and posts, forums are more focused and allow you to hone in on the discussions that matter to you. Longevity: Threads and discussions on forums can stay active for years, which means that you can join in on discussions that are still relevant and continue to learn and engage with others. Better Organization: Most forums are organized by topics, which means that you can easily find discussions that are relevant to you and not have to wade through a bunch of unrelated posts. Learning Opportunities: Music forums offer a wealth of knowledge and learning opportunities for aspiring musicians. You can learn about new techniques, discover new software, and ask questions to experienced musicians. Constructive Criticism: Forums offer a space for musicians to give and receive constructive criticism on their work, which can help improve their craft. Support: Forums offer a supportive environment where musicians can connect with others who understand the struggles and challenges of the industry and offer emotional support. Networking: Music forums allow you to connect with other musicians, producers, and industry professionals, which can lead to opportunities to collaborate or work together. Sense of Community: Forums create a sense of community among musicians, which can be difficult to find on social media where there are often too many distractions. No Distractions: Music forums are designed specifically for discussing music-related topics, which means that there are no distractions or irrelevant posts to sift through. No/Few Ads: Forums are generally ad-free, which means that you won't have to deal with annoying ads popping up while you're trying to engage with others. Less Trolls: Because music forums have a more focused and serious community, there are typically fewer trolls and people looking to cause trouble. More Privacy: Music forums typically require registration, which means that your discussions and personal information are more private and less likely to be seen by strangers. More Depth: Because music forums are designed for more in-depth discussions, you can expect to find more detailed and informative discussions than you would on social media. More Time for Replies: Music forums offer a slower pace of discussion than social media which can allow users more time to formulate thoughtful replies and engage in more meaningful discussion. Better Searchability: Forums often have better search functionality than social media, which can help you find specific discussions or topics that you're interested in more easily.

When most people think about producing albums, they automatically associate it with something glamours. They imagine a high end studio, the latest in software and hardware, walls littered with instruments, Marshall`s amps everywhere, Steinway Pianos as far as the eye can see, groupies stripping in cages during recording sessions, and all sorts of extravagant settings. They imagine something grandiose, filling their heads with lofty fantasies of a luxurious lifestyle. They think that all producers drive a Porsche, wear expensive suits, smoke cigars, and wake up to no less than five big breasted supermodel girlfriends that serve them Russian caviar for breakfast.
 
But we know better, don`t we. We know about the literal mountain of cables and wires that we trip on each day, the constant tinkering with the software, the cost of maintenance to both instruments and hardware alike, trying not to sneeze next to something sensitive, and having to take constant breaks just to stand infront of the AC, because shit gets hot real fast. Not to mention tuning up everything from a DB-drum set, to a kazoo that somehow got tossed in the room. And I don`t even own a kazoo! all these things and more, are just the tip of the iceberg. There are so many other elements in the equation, stuff which is so incredibly boring and mundane, that listing them will literally put me to sleep. And these are just some of the many MANY reasons why I don`t like reading articles and magazine about post-production. I find most articles as being life draining and incredibly boring. Which kinda sucks because keeping up with these sorts of things is part of the jig.
 
Though I always try to keep an open mind, ya know? perhaps there is someone out there that can offer me salvation, and present me with an incredible literal journey. Any takers? @MikeRobinson? @Cody?
 
* You probably have no idea why I pinged you. Allow me to explain: this blog mostly serves as a means of comedic relief. A "break" from some of the seriousness (and sometimes boredom) of the open forum. In my previous entry in I mentioned that I was considering to ping active members without warning, for shits and giggles. Just to see what happens. Some of my readers might have thought that I was joking. Well... I wasn't 😅 truth be told, you might not fit into the aforementioned category of the type of people I was considering to ping over here. You can read all about that if your interested. Anyway that`s, that. Now your here! welcome! I hope you enjoy your stay, brief as it might be ! lol  I hope you are not too taken off by this. And if you are.. well.. too late *
 
And now i`m going back to my usual writing like this never happened.
 
Though producing an album on your own is actually one of the lesser evils. If your a DIY artist, you mostly have to contend with yourself or with whatever oil baron or sweatshop is sponsoring you. There is more to it of course, but that is just one end of the spectrum. Awhile back I made a thread about collaborations, raising a few questions around that subject. Ya`ll don`t know this about me, but I generally tend to avoid such murky waters. Its not that I "hate" working with other people. Far from it. But.. there are certain types of musicians who I just... can`t stand working with. Especially people that come from the soundtrack neck of the woods. Classical musicians and composers tend to come from very specific backrounds, and they tend to have very particular demands.
 
Oh shit. You know what? f*ck it. I have been too nice about this until now. Let me show you what a "day at the office" looks like for me, and what sort of people I have to deal with sometimes.
 
Dramatic reenactment:
 
VX:
"Okay so... M.r British player. I sent you the music sheet last week. Have you recorded the violin parts?"
 
British Player:
"A violin?! oh my dear sweet innocent child. This is not a 'violin'. This is a Stradivarius! it was hand crafted, polished, and thoroughly licked by no less than twelve Italian eunuchs, before being presented to me by Antonio Stradivari himself!"
 
VX:
"Isn't he dead though?"
 
British Player:
"Only in the hearts and minds of the ignorant..."
 
VX:
"Well its a good thing you said only twelve eunuchs. If you said thirteen that might have sounded crazy..".
 
British Player:
"You know sarcasm is the trademark of the under-educated..."
 
VX:
"Yeah just like how listening to fossils rambling is a form of corporal punishment. Anyway. I don`t care. I'd like to get this over with. Have you finished the recording?"
 
British Player:
"Recording? RECORDING?! oh no, my dear boy. I have most certainly NOT... 'recorded'. That is not what I intended to do. What I am doing is.. I am.. preforming a..."

VX:
"Oh no..."

British Player:
"A miracle...".

VX:
"F*cking hell."

British Player:
"Yes. And it shall be.. the most glorious union of instruments! do not avert your eyes, boy! for you are witnessing.. greatness. Just imagine the setup. The dimmed lighting of candles. Lemon scented incense. French wine. Dozens of dazzling orchids evenly spread across the room, in the shape of a musical note. And to top it off.. a single white lily dove, gracefully perching on its extravagantly adorned cage. Have you ever held a dove, boy? they are incredibly soft creatures.."

VX: 
"Okay so we are doing this. First of all. No. You need help. Second. That is the stuff of nightmares. Third. That is not a dove. That is a taxidermy sitting on a stick..."
 
British Player:
"Can you believe this fellow? such a lack of imagination! no wonder your generation can`t produce any real music. You and your Justin Bieber`s, Rihanna`s and Skrillexe`s, infesting the music industry with your vile and loathsome creations. My generation has witnessed true greatness from the likes of Louis Armstrong, Elvis and Bob Dylan! oh do tell me, boy, what does your generation have? cat videos? ASMR videos of people pressing Spacebars? oh that`s right, I forgot who I was dealing with. You wouldn't be able to recognize good music unless it was sprinkled into lines of cocaine".
 
VX:
"What is this, Attack of the Boomers? why are you even here? aren't you suppose to make a guest appearance in Rick and Morty? listen, Rasputin, I don`t care how they did things back in the stone age, or how many slaves you own. Now please... id like nothing more than to just.. go away, and let you get back to your Masonry. I`m sure that your deeply missed back at the mansion. So, please, for the love of God, can you do us both a favor and just record the f*cking track? that way I can go back to consuming large quantities of a alcohol to repress this experience, and than you can go back to your cult..."
 

 
Life.
What a strange phenomena.
We study it to no end, yet, it continues to baffle us, and it raises the most profound questions.
 
Why are we here? Where are we heading? is there intelligent life out there? Is there a God? is there an afterlife? will the governments of the world ever enforce a mandate in elementary schools that forces snotty Gen Z`s to watch re-runs of "Married with Children", so they they will get off their lilly asses and stop acting like little bitches everytime someone says a fat joke?
 
The answers to these questions, are things we might never know. If only there was SOMEONE that could give us answers. They say that freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes. That`s Gandhi.
 
BUT WE ARE NOT HERE TO LISTEN TO PEOPLE THAT STARVED THEMSELVES! WE ARE HERE TO LISTEN TO SOMETHING THAT ACTUALLY MATTERS! what? ideology? ha! more like, Brokelogy, am I right? I wonder if Gandhi was deliberately trying to set an example for homeless people, or if things were really that bad in India. Crazy old coot. Forget about him. Let me introduce you to a guy that has a REAL stake on things...
 
Introducing: @Popthree. AKA: Mike Kennedy. <-- ITS A LINK TO HIS MUSIC. The man. The myth. The legend. The girls.
https://cdn2.songstuff.com/uploads/monthly_2021_06/328062_22896.jpg.0f22a3f225506f8182c3579f58ec1e31.jpg
 
Personal Bio:
Hunter. Explorer. Humanitarian. Wife collector. Father of twelve. Heart breaker. Entrepreneur. Oil baron. Arms dealer. Illuminati member. Secret owner of Microsoft. Musical genius, prodigy of all things and CEO of everything! and when this guy makes music - you know he MEANS business!
 
Because when your listening to his songs, your not just "listening to music". Oh no. "Listening to music" is something you can say when you hear homeless people drumming with sticks over garbage bins. What we have here, is something more. Because when you are soaking in Mike`s divine melodies, your not just... "listening to music", like some ape that's being electrocuted for the sake of testing out hair products. Oh no. When you hear his songs, you are experiencing a... revelation! one might even say, that you are soaking in an 'evolution' of mind, body, soul, and even the universe itself! though don`t take my word for it. Lets hear some testimonies from people that were inspired by his albums!
 

 
Bio:
Clueless businessman & insignificant inventor of silly things. He was genetically modified to only dates blondes, exclusively.
 
Elon Musk:
"Before I started listening to Mike`s music, I didn't know what to do with myself. Working day in day out at the docks, lifting heavy things and polishing people`s shoes, I kept hearing voices telling me: Tesla Tesla Tesla. Back at the time I hadn't heard Mike`s music yet, so my brain was less evolved and I have been know to get startled and faint by hearing loud noises and thinking about futuristic ideas. But all that changed once I heard Mike`s music! its like... all of a sudden I just `knew`things, ya know? science, engineering, physics, I used to think that those things were cake toppings! ha! imagine that! you changed my life, Mike! HERE - take these naked pictures I have here of internationally acclaimed performer and personal sex toy, formally known as Grimes. I know that she`s not on the same caliber of the girls that you are used too. But common take it, for my sake! I know that shes just a silly trophy artsy wife I took in for good measure. But i`m sure that you can get a solid price on E-Bay for these puppies!"
 
Lets hear another testimony!
 

 
Bio:
Occupation - struggling actress, dances on tables, gets fondled on national television. Commonly known for playing the role of "Black Widow" from the Marvel movie franchise. Squeezing into tailor made catsuits is also how she got accepted into acting school.
 
Scarlett Johansson:
"You might not be able to tell this about me, but I wasn't very popular growing up. I had braces, I was overweight and flat chested. Kids used to make fun by saying: "oh no here comes the scarlet moon! lets get outta here, we don`t get sucked into its gravity!". They also used to throw Pink Floyd albums at my head. "The Wall", they called it. You know, because I had no breasts. Overall I was really just the dumbest, most hopeless girl you ever met. When all the kids started riding bicycles, I was that one kid banging coconuts on the floor, making hoof noises, pretending I was riding a horse. Yup. Things were looking grim."
 
"But all that changed thanks to Mike! you see, my parents felt sorry for me, so they got me one of Mikes albums for my 10th birthday. And there I was, listening to Mike`s music while standing on the table during class. As I often do for some reason. And then all of a sudden... it happened. Mike started singing! and it was like magic! all of a sudden my head started filling with flashing images of melons and gyms! I started seeing complex galaxies, and started to understand languages I never understood before! like English! all of the sudden... the entire world just... made sense. for the first time in my life. I felt like all universal paradoxes were solved, by the voice of an angel. This is exactly why I had Mike`s face tattooed on my thighs. You are a true gift to the world, Mike! we should make love until my ovaries dry out!"
 
You heard it here folks. It can`t be argued with scientifically. Mike`s music is not only DIVINE, it is life altering. No longer will you be slaves to your gene pool, and be restrained by the cruel hands of fates. And if you haven't heard his songs yet, than right now you are just another feeble drone plagued by an unfair existence. Just another sheep being overwhelmed by a whirlwind of your life`s mundane obligations. But with the help of Mike`s music, you could become so much more! his music is SO GOOD it can impregnate women! so hide your daughters! ha! you should know that people that haven't heard his stuff have a tenancy to die young. So go check his stuff out RIGHT NOW before your dick gets small, and your wife gets large. TRUE STORY!
 
We interrupt this broadcast to bring you a special report.
 
So I wanted to finish the monologue segments and do a proper closing, but unfortunately I had to stop writing because I had some shit to do. Maybe i`ll make a "part II" from this or at a later time. No promises though. Anyway. As you can see, I have started to play around with the Mock sponsorship bits. I`m mostly just shooting ideas off the top of my head, but its been really fun to write like this. So did you guys like it? what do you think? would any of my other readers like to become a sponsor? i`m looking at YOU @Steve Mueske! or maybe one of the new comers? i`m also interested in doing mock song reviews (you can find more information here). Though that option is not for the faint of heart, as those will not be in a form of glorification. That`s only for people that want me to roast their songs.
 
Here is the list of upcoming sponsors: (additional submission requests can be added here. I`ll edit them in).
@Mahesh @john
 
 

A FEW UPDATES: I did attend the Song Contest at the wild Goose, but didn’t win—Gene Burnett took first place, and Frankie Hernandez second, and I can’t argue with the decision: both guys are awful good at what they do. There were additionally at least two more writers I would have rated higher’n me if I were doing the judging. Nonetheless, George Clark (on harmonica) and I did the crowd a good job with “Armadillo on the Interstate” and “Bluebird on My Windshield.” The audience were clapping along with the second one, and listening raptly to the first. I can’t complain.

AUDITIONS today for a sort of “superstar show”; I went—and found I either knew or had heard of all of the other folks auditioning. It’s reportedly a benefit for the community college, organized by the students. Happens in June at the big Ginger Rogers Theater in downtown Medford. $1,000 prize (which I’m obviously interested in). Gave ‘em “Eatin’ Cornflakes from a Hubcap Blues” and “The Termite Song”; they did have me fill out a form for coming to the second round of auditions (which is maybe a good thing—I don’t know if they do that for everybody).

GOT TO PLAY LEAD on Darrin Wayne’s songs at tonight’s Southern Oregon Songwriters “showcase.”. Bunch of compliments, which I think means it turned out okay. May result in my being tapped for more lead work, which is what I was after. Tomorrow Darrin and I will get together to practice.

‘TIS THE SEASON: With March coming up, I can resurrent two seasonal favorites, “Invitation to St. Patrick” (another sleazy blues) and (for St. Leif’s Day) “The Six-Legged Polka.” Found an accordion player I’d like to tap for the latter, and sent him the *.mp3 file. (He hasn’t contacted me back.)

WHAT ELSE have I got going on? The Paying Gig at the Wild Goose is supposed to happen in March; that’s a 3-hour set. (Currently playing phone tag with the booking agent.) Most folks who do these have a partner, so they can trade off, but I’m tentatively planning on doing it all myself—I have more than enough songs to fill 3 hours. I want a band, though—and have to assemble them and practice. Done right—like, if we pack the place—it should result in other gigs. It’ll also be a good kickofff for assembling the “joelist” fan base.

Started work on the “joelist.” Maybe 100 entries initially, from the current e-mail archives and including the Southern Oregon Songwriters Assn. members I know (there are a bunch of ‘em I don’t know). Includes a bunch of out-of-town folks, too, that I’ve met at Pineyfest and suchlike places. (No, they aren’t likely to come to concerts, but they’re a market for CDs.) Next step—the old e-mail archives, which go back to the birth of “Alice” the computer in 2003.

UPCOMING: Next week is the annual city-county insurance conference (leave Wednesday, ends Friday afternoon), and it appears the “house” band we put together last year is still in business—they’ll be playing Thursday night, and I’ll be playing with them. Their “songbook” features two of my songs, “Duct Tape” and “Naked Space Hamsters in Love.” Friday, I’ll get to play with the Friday Night Group again in Garibaldi—and solicit additions to the “joelist.”

Joe

ANOTHER PAYING GIG! This one’s on the Coast, at the Bay City Arts Center, five miles from Garibaldi. SATURDAY, 7 MARCH, 7 P.M. $5 cover charge, split between me (60%) and the Arts Center (40%). They’ll sell refreshments, and I’ll sell CDs. They were excited about the idea, which was really gratifying. (And many thanks to my daughter for making the suggestion.)

I would like to be playing with a band for this gig, too. The Arts Center, an antebellum-style Masonic Lodge built in 1927, has a nice stage and a dance floor that covers most of the upstairs—and I have noticed some folks in Bay City do like to dance. I assume the Portland guys aren’t interested in hauling themselves and equipment two hours each way over the mountains to the Coast—though I’d love to have them be the band (they are really good). I’ll undoubtedly have to tap local resources for the band. There are quite a few musicians in the area who know me, and that I’ve played with; the question is who’s available and interested. Ideally, I’d like to have a bass player, and both a “whiny lead” (fiddle, harmonica or accordion) and “non-whiny lead” (guitar). I’ll need to talk to all the folks this week.

So now I have two notices to send out to the “joelist,” and another set of bulletins for the Facebook and MySpace accounts. There’s a smaller number of local media to deal with in the immediate area, but I can reach further afield—maybe an hour’s worth north and south. The media folks in Licoln City, Seaside, and Astoria won’t know who I am, but maybe if I act like I’m Big Time, they’ll think I am.

What to play? I should assume, until told otherwise, that it’s a 2-hour gig; the Arts Center tends to attract a family crowd, and I should assume a lot of folks will have their kids. With five hours of material to draw from, there should be no problem devising two hours of “family-friendly” fare. Everything I’ve written is pretty simple—one big advantage of country music is that it’s easy to follow.

This is, I think, the first time the Arts Center has booked somebody local to do a concert, and if this one can draw a big enough crowd, there may be more—both for me, and for other local artists. There’s plenty of talent hiding out in these woods—I’ve met a lot of it—but it hasn’t had outlets. The Friday Night Group in Garibaldi has been not only the only game in town, but sometimes the only live music in the whole region, for much of its seven-year run.

Can I have the Five-dollar Album together in time for the Arts Center gig to be a CD release party? I don’t know. I’ve definitely got some work to do to pull that off; I’d want everything ready to manufacture within a week from now, and I’ve got four songs (I think) I want to re-do for the album. It’s not so much my parts I worry about—I have gotten pretty good at getting what I want on tape (or on chip) in one or two takes—but I’d like to have a better lead than just my guitar on each one of those.

If not, there is maybe St. Leif’s Day (March 29). I would really like to be playing music somewhere on St. Leif’s Day; since the old Swede is the patron saint of bagpipes (among other things), it is appropriate to celebrate the occasion by playing music. And it’s a Sunday this year. If I promote the idea heavily, it may happen somewhere.

THE “BROKEN RECORD”: Time-and-motion studies were something I did a lot as a city manager—I always wanted to know how long it took me and others to do things, so I could figure out how to be more efficient. For the “Broken Record,” assembling the cases, including printing the covers on photographic paper, took on average six minutes apiece. It’d have taken less time had I less primitive tools. The liner notes are taking twice as long to print and assemble, because there’s more trimming. I can’t factor in my original desgn costs, because that’s nothing but my time, and it took longer because it was my first. The next time (assuming there’s a next time), it’ll be faster because I know what I’m doing and the templates already exist.

Costs? There are 20 CDs, each with cover, label, liner notes, and (of course) CD, and they all have to be mailed to their respective recipients. Looks like total out-of-pocket costs, including postage, will come to just about $3.70 per CD, and that’s not bad. I wouldn’t save any money by hiring out the printing and assembly—the cost is almost exactly the same—but I would save time. A lot of this is work I can’t do very fast myself because I don’t have the proper tools.

UPCOMING: Ghost Hole Wednesday; the Friday Night Group on Friday (of course); band practice Saturday—last practice, I think, before the Big Gig. A birthday party on Saturday, too, at which they may be playing music. I believe the Devil done lost his workshop—I no longer have idle hands.

Joe