Challenge #15 Writing For The Strolling Bones

[john]

Hi Gang

Recent rumours that The Strolling Bones were planning to record a new single and release it became more tangible when they asked our challenge writers to write a song and pitch it to them! At least, that is how your intrepid Songstuff writer development team has interpreted their garbled message.

The song is for the pop rock genre, not too fast, not too slow, not too high, not too low!

The song MUST use one of the following titles, and that titles MUST be the main hook:

Sticky When Rich

Drippin' Love

Keep It Up All Night

Red Hot Mama

Long Leg Lover

Sixty Nine

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write the lyrics for this song. Your finished lyric should be posted to the Lyrics Critique board with the topic title "lyrics challenge - your title" where your title is one of the titles above.

Your lyrics SHOULD NOT be posted to the lyrics critique board BEFORE WEDNESDAY.

Your topic MUST include a poll where the question is:

"Is this song worthy of The Strolling Bones?"

And the answers are:

"No - It would make Mick sick"

"Yes - It would get them satisfaction"

Your song is a SUCCESS if 66% or more vote yes!

Meanwhile, feel free to post your lyrics to this board and discuss them.

[Kel]

I can't write bad enough for them!

 

However, since this is a challenge, I'll go for Red Hot Mama

 

Kel

Edited September 29, 2013 by Kel

[Rudi]

John,

 

1/ Do we all have to select a different line/hook?

 

2/ Can we change it if we run dry?

 

3/ Is there to be any music for these lyrics? I know you outlined this previously but a restatement seems in order.

 

Until answered, I will plump for 'Sticky When Rich'. I dont have clue what it means, but thats why it appeals.

 

Thanks.

[JDHarris]

I've done Sitxy-nine (69) Now

 

but I don't know how to add the poll part?  Help!  Before my red door turns black, or by Wednesday, please.

 

Thanks

 

P.S.

Can I post the lyric for discussion now?  Or do we wait until Wednesday?

Edited September 29, 2013 by JDHarris

[john]

I can't write bad enough for them!

 

However, since this is a challenge, I'll go for Red Hot Mama

 

Kel

That is partly the exercise lol actually it's more about observation and writing to a brief for a client in this one. They go for a fairly typical lyric which is one factor that makes them suitable for our writing attentions.

[john]

John,

 

1/ Do we all have to select a different line/hook?

Nope, not this time, just the one that most inspires you

2/ Can we change it if we run dry?

Is that a suggestion right there?

My initial thoughts were that you each had a pool to choose from, why not do two? One drawn from the titles given another if a title/hook you prefer presents itself? Just a thought. Honestly, I am fairly easy, it's the rest of the group that will point and stare

 

3/ Is there to be any music for these lyrics? I know you outlined this previously but a restatement seems in order.

 

No, I thought one ongoing challenge for a complete song was enough at a time. If we, as a group and as a wider community, get used to putting music to the lyrics challenges we may do some more, but right now seems to be a bit of a struggle covering all entries. On that I thought about starting a topic asking for volunteers who would be interested in helping with the music for challenge songs.

Until answered, I will plump for 'Sticky When Rich'. I dont have clue what it means, but thats why it appeals.

 

Thanks.

That was kinda why it appealed to me, and also thought it quite suited them. A title I bet they wish they thought of lol

[john]

I've done Sitxy-nine (69) Now

 

but I don't know how to add the poll part?  Help!  Before my red door turns black, or by Wednesday, please.

 

Thanks

 

P.S.

Can I post the lyric for discussion now?  Or do we wait until Wednesday?

Okay, you don't need the poll until Wednesday, so I will see if I can write up a quick tutorial before then.

Meanwhile you can post your lyrics as a reply to this topic so our group can discuss them before they are added to the general lyrics critique board on Wednesday.

[JDHarris]

Ok I have two written for Sixty Nine.  It's the same lyric idea, one has more details to complete points and thoughts with a slightly different spin than version 1 

 

 

thanks

 

jan

Edited September 30, 2013 by JDHarris

[Lisa Gates]

"Drippin Love" suits me fine

 

[Rudi]

I love this idea

 

May I ask..

What is / was the challenge /invite from the Stones John?

[Kel]

Red Hot Mama - First Draft

 

You might think I toe the line too easy

You might think I give in way to fast

You might think I ain't balls to stand up

You don't realise just what I got...

 

My red hot Mama

She ain't so easy to please

My red hot Mama

She got me on my knees

She's a red hot Mama

A red hot Mama to me!

 

You could say she's way hard to handle

You could say she's got me on a string

You could say she's way out of control

You don't realise just what I got...

 

My red hot Mama

She ain't so easy to please

My red hot Mama

She got me on my knees

She's a red hot Mama

A red hot Mama to me!

 

My red hot Mama

She ain't so easy to please

My red hot Mama

She got me on my knees

She's a red hot Mama

A red hot Mama to me!

 

I can see Mick doing his chicken strut to this.. lol

[Kel]

it's interesting to see the complete contrast in the stories our two lyrics tell from the same title.

K

[goldylocks]

Kel, your right, I never thought of it, until you saw it with your keen observation. Yours is about someone who can't get enough of Red Hot Mama. As mine is about someone who is addicted to her because she's hot and sexy, but knows she's no good and wants to be free!

 

I think yours is more a Rolling Stone lyric though, mine unfortunately, after I read over and over sounds Pop or Country.

 

Goldy    

[Kel]

Glad you saw that yourself. I don't like the Stones so I went and looked at some of their lyrics and they are very basic and repetitive for the most part, hence my lyric. (I hope John liked that!)

 

But now you see it, you can adjust it.

 

Kel

[goldylocks]

Glad you saw that yourself. I don't like the Stones so I went and looked at some of their lyrics and they are very basic and repetitive for the most part, hence my lyric. (I hope John liked that!)

 

But now you see it, you can adjust it.

 

Kel

Thanks Kel, I'll try a rewrite, if I can get it on on time, fighting a weather change flu.

 

Goldy  

[JDHarris]

Ok ready, I think for discussion.  Don't want to post in the wrong place, so if this is the right place, please let me know.  I don't see anywhere here where I can copy my file and paste the text or add from here,  I guess I have to rekey text.

 

My (LOTK), Lack Of Technical Knowledge,  has kept me down before, almost I must protest, I won't stay down no more.

 

thanks Jan

[JDHarris]

my questions have been answered,  I should have read others before I asked.  sorry.  Duh !

jan

Edited September 30, 2013 by JDHarris

[JDHarris]

Sixty Nine (69) Now, don't have chorus or bridge in place yet.  Do all songs need them.?

 

Version 1: Sixty Nine  (69) Now

 

69 now

I'm a worried man

69 days I'll be away

Not hearing you say

Baby I miss you

When you coming home to stay?

 

Sixty nine ways I was born to please 

Be understanding of me girl

when I leave, baby behave

Be careful where you step

when you're stepping out and free

I can see where those steps lead

 

Sixty Nine stares baby beware

hear the call of those barking hounds

sixty nine signs baby take care if you wander there

don't you know they're just using you

don't care like I do

Spew empty lies to be with you

 

Some men will tell you, try to explain

Saying when I'm not around, Yeah girl it's the real deal

69's real love it just seems upside down

something upside down

don't take your love to town

Sixty nine now will bring us down, if you ride with him now

[Kel]

can we write to a existing song of theirs? use the melody.

 

les

More songwriters do this than admit to it!

 

Paul Simon has admitted to it, so why not?

 

Kel

[JDHarris]

Version 2:  Highway Sixty Nine      (Basically the same premise just a different spin)

 

Flight 669 leaving town at 7:09 am

I'm a worried man

Scared you might slip n go joy ride again

Don't go down the road, no don't cross the line

Please don't drive

Down highway, down highway 69

 

Please girl don't take that road

There's danger round each bend

If you go travelling stepping out with other men

It will be hard for you and I

to make again amends

Don't trust

 

The hoards of trolling men, lurking in the dark

Cast their lines, a fish like you, might swallow  when they bark

Take it slow baby, yeah just don't go

Don't play the part, take care your heart

Don't drive in that guys lane 

You know its not safe, please stay out of the game

 

69 my little fish sign, They only want to dine

Lead you astray when I'm away

Don't be their game

Don't change your mind up now 

It's mans game, don't you know

It's men who make and break rules

 

Don't be fooled by what they say

Close your mind and ears

Words, may take your breath away

Be wary when I say, don't believe words they repeat

Don't go down , no don't go down

that Highway look around

 

Highway 69 there ain't no way

love ever could be found 

Don't go down , no don't go down

that highway 69

69 I'm on sixty nine

I coming home now

69 oh 69 and

I'll be coming now